Many believe that living in a city offers greater benefits compared to life in the countryside. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some people argue that people who live in a
city
obtain more advantages than those who live in the countryside. Generally, this
might be true as a metropolitan city
is advertised as a city
that is
full of opportunities. But, I partially agree with that statement since it is applied to some particular conditions only, which will be discussed in the following paragraph.
To begin
with, the benefits for each city
depend on the type of businesses. The big cities are suitable places for service businesses, such
as financial services or digital services, while
farming industries are obviously better to do in the countryside. In the big cities, all big companies usually gather in an exclusive block, so it will be easier to manage relations there and all opportunities are in the same place. In the terrains, on the other hand
, benefits are abundant for farmers due to
wide land and better air quality. Activities such
as herding the sheep can only be done in a particular area like the countryside.
Another thing to consider besides
the occupations is age. The elderly are more comfortable living in quiet places where there is no air or noise pollution. This
condition is good for their weak bodies which no longer resist any kind of disease, so they will have more life expectations. However
, the youngsters might choose a busy city
to live in because there are more employment prospects,
unless they plan to be farmers.
In conclusion, virtues earned from the location we live in depend on our conditions Remove the comma
apply
such
as jobs and age groups. People should assess their conditions before choosing a place to stay.Submitted by erniwbs on
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task achievement
Ensure a clear position is maintained throughout the essay. While a partial agreement is acceptable, make more explicit references to how and why you agree or disagree.
coherence cohesion
Your essay would benefit from more varied and complex sentence structures to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
Incorporate a range of linking devices and transition phrases to improve the logical flow of ideas.
task achievement
Provide more detailed examples to support your main points; these examples need to be specific and clearly linked to your argument.