Popular events like the football World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way. Do you agree or disagree？

#events #football #world #cup #occasions #tensions #emotions #disagree？

In our developing world, virtually all the countries in the world organize different competitions in close collaboration with each other in order to identify the best athletes or players.

In other words

, the main root of coordinating international

sports

events is to reinforce the ties of friendship and peace among nations. On the one hand, popular events

such

as the Football World Cup, Olympic games, and Champions League have massive global followings and have become cultural touchstones, bringing together people from all walks of life and different countries.

As a result

sports

tournaments bring numerous benefits to the host nation's economy and society.

Besides

, during

sports

events, participants make friends and build stable relationships with them. I strongly believe that winning the competition doesn't matter, the crucial thing is participating.

On the other hand

, some

sports

matches can make international relations worse. To set an example, competitors can not control their emotions in some circumstances.

For instance

, if the ref doesn't give a penalty kick, footballers say dirty words to the ref.

Furthermore

, some participants tend to injure their rivals on purpose. Sometimes, after the matches, the two rivals blame each other and their patriotic emotions explode in an aggressive way. Even a much worse thing is that the troubles caused by losing games affect the players directly. In conclusion, I strongly believe that international

sports

occasions can be one of the foodways to ease tensions

as well as

to release patriotism safely.

Hence

, I think that games can not be the fundamental way

for

Change preposition

show examples

the sound patriotism or peaceful international relations.

Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on Fri Dec 08 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea with relevant supporting details. Expand on the points made and give more detailed examples to strengthen the argument.

Task Achievement

Stay focused on the prompt throughout the essay. While you addressed the topic, the argument would benefit from stronger examples and a more balanced discussion of how sports events both ease tensions and could potentially exacerbate them. Aim to directly address the prompt in the introduction and conclusion to ensure a full response.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Popular events like the football World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way. Do you agree or disagree？

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion

An increasing number of larger shopping areas, malls and department stores are leading to the decline of smaller corner shops. what are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping in larger shopping centers rather than smaller, more traditional shops?

some people belive that public health that government duties but some people believe that is own health for everyone. Discuss both of views

It was predicted that people living in the twenty-first century would have more free time than ever before because of improvements in technology. To what extent has this prediction come true?

You have a spare room in your Apartment that you would like to rent out to a student. Write a letter to your Student Accommodation Officer of local college and say 1. Where is your apartment located? 2. When will the room be available 3. What are the requirements for a student to stay?