Many museums charge admission fees while others are free. Do the advantages of charging people to visit a museum outweigh the disadvantages?

Recently, a rising
number
of
museums
have reportedly commenced charging for entry even though other
museums
remain free entry.
This
essay will suggest that requiring entrance fees presents advantages that far outweigh its downsides. One evident benefit of
this
move is forming a sense of respect towards history and
art
subjects among
visitors
.
This
is a symbol that the attendees are willing to spend their money upon seeing and learning from historical relics and
art
collections
which, for a substantial
number
of people, are less intriguing.
Furthermore
, entrance fees can aid museum authorities financially to
further
preserve their historical
collections
and
art
icons, renovate the venues to have better and more useful amenities for the attendants,
as well as
reconstruct the damaged relics. To put things into perspective, a paid entry
art
centre in Jakarta gains an
overall
high rating on the internet for their effort in presenting excellent quality
collections
while
the majority of free-entry
museums
cultivate
overall
low to average
rating
Fix the agreement mistake
ratings
show examples
for their standard collection and limited facilities.
On the other hand
, imposing
admission
fees may lead to a decline in the
number
of
visitors
. The idea of visiting a museum is arguably uncommon in the modern day, particularly for the younger generation and what has been attracting them to visit is free of
admission
.
For instance
, a heritage centre in Kota Tua, Jakarta, was
initially
free of
admission
and managed to attract a huge
number
of the general public at the time, but once they introduced a new regulation of paid entrance, the
number
of
visitors
gradually decreased.
However
,
this
issue may be taken into resolution if the authorities are able to improve some aspects of the
museums
. On balance, the fact that implementing
admission
for charges may embed courtesy within
visitors
and foster financial assistance to
museums
or
art
centres outweighs the consequence of losing
visitors
as long as they could provide better facilities and
collections
.
Submitted by 2024successielts on

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coherence cohesion
You have articulated your points cohesively with a clear logical structure. However, while you provided examples, they could be further strengthened by incorporating more specific details or data that supports your argument.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion and responds to the task questions comprehensively. Enhance your work by including a wider range of examples, beyond localized examples, to cement your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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