In modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with other people through internet. But others against it. Do you think this is positive trend or negative trend.

Daily activity is now easier to do
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
society because of the presence of the
internet
and it gives a lot of benefits.
However
, some individuals argue that
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
circumtances
Correct your spelling
circumstances
circumstance
consider
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
negative. In
this
essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will explain why
this
should be perceived as a positive trend for two main reasons. First and foremost,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
of people nowadays are
dependen
Correct your spelling
dependent
with
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
existance
Correct your spelling
existence
of
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. By
utilise
Wrong verb form
utilising
show examples
it, workers can do their
task
Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
show examples
at home and
no
Add a missing verb
have no
show examples
need to
commuting
Wrong verb form
commute
show examples
to the office.
Moreover
, they can spend a lot of
time
at home for another schedule.
In addition
,
this
also
can save more money because they
no
Verb problem
do not
show examples
need to pay for transportation
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
. To illustrate, a person
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
in
suburbs
Correct article usage
the suburbs
show examples
of Jakarta should take approximately an hour to get to their office,
then
they can use travel
time
to
workout
Correct your spelling
work out
show examples
if they can work from their dwelling.
Secondly
, shopping now is more
confinient
Correct your spelling
convenient
by
Change preposition
than
show examples
the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. There are a bunch of e-commerce applications available, which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
really help
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
modern society to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
their essential needs. In
this
regard, we not only get many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
item choices but
also
vary
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
price.
Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,
show examples
some
application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
show examples
also
offer
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
free delivery.
Those all
Correct determiner usage
All these
show examples
advantages, can
leads
Change the verb form
lead
show examples
to more
time efficient
Add a hyphen
time-efficient
show examples
and frugal living.
For instance
, delivering groceries online
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
time saving
Add a hyphen
time-saving
show examples
for
busy
Add an article
the busy
a busy
show examples
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
. They can just order and wait until the package
come
Correct subject-verb agreement
comes
show examples
while
working.
To sum up
,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
not only
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
way of working but
also
time
efficient for shopping. I,
therefore
, remain firmly that the
internet
can be only seen as a positive development.
Submitted by 2024successielts on

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task achievement
The essay partially acknowledges the contrasting viewpoints which is essential for addressing the prompt fully; however, more development is needed to fully present and refute the opposing view.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction includes a clear thesis statement and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
To improve your score, work on developing clear topic sentences for each paragraph, followed by relevant supporting statements and examples, ensuring each paragraph remains focused on a single idea.
task achievement
For a higher band score, consider incorporating specific examples that demonstrate the effects of the internet on society, including both work and shopping as outlined.

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