People nowadays sleep less than they used to in the past. What do you think is the reason behind this? What are the effects on individuals and people around them?
It is generally acknowledged that in these days and
Fix the agreement mistake
ages
age
people tend to sleep less compared to recent ages. In Add a comma
age,
this
essay, I will examine the factors that contribute towards the lack of sleep and the effects it causes.
Linking Words
To begin
with, social media plays a significant role in Linking Words
this
problem. Linking Words
In other words
, the increased intake of social media becomes the cause of undersleeping. Linking Words
For example
, a Linking Words
person
who is on their phone all the time, Use synonyms
such
as the online platform TikTok would ignore his well-being and would rather doom scrolling thanks to the dopamine rush he got and Linking Words
as a result
, he is now addicted, Linking Words
thus
, Linking Words
sleep
Wrong verb form
sleeping
fewer
. Correct quantifier usage
less
In addition
, an individual who is addicted to playing games would abandon his need to reach certain levels or ranks in games. Linking Words
This
, of course, could lead to a bigger problem, Linking Words
for
Linking Words
instance
mental health issues.
Add the comma(s)
instance,
Therefore
, I believe Linking Words
due to
these factors, the impact of the lack of sleep is that individuals' effectiveness is declining owing to not having enough sleep. When the body Linking Words
fulfilling
its recommended sleeping hours, the Wrong verb form
fulfils
person
Use synonyms
would wake
up feeling energetic in comparison with those who slept under eight or nine hours. Wrong verb form
wakes
For instance
, an individual would start his day with a lack of energy. Linking Words
Moreover
, Linking Words
due to
tiredness, a Linking Words
person
's mood could change easily, Use synonyms
hence
, he would feel sensitive.
In conclusion, in the past people slept more than nowadays. I reckon that social media has a big role in Linking Words
this
issue, Linking Words
moreover
, it has a negative impact on the Linking Words
person
's productivity.Use synonyms
Submitted by jessiicarr1705 on
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structure
Ensure the essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The introduction should introduce the topic and provide a clear position on the issue. Each body paragraph should have a clear main idea followed by explanations and/or examples. The conclusion should summarize the main points and restate your position.
task response
To improve task achievement, make sure to fully address all parts of the prompt. This essay mentioned the reasons and effects superficially. It would be better to explore these in more depth, providing more detailed explanations and specific examples.
coherence cohesion
Work on the development of ideas. Each paragraph needs a clear central theme that is developed logically. Also, ensure that paragraphs flow smoothly from one to the next with suitable transition words and phrases.
lexical resource
Use a range of vocabulary to accurately reflect the complexity of the topic. Avoid repetition and ensure precision in word choice.
grammatical range accuracy
Check your writing for grammatical errors and strive to use a variety of sentence structures. Accurate use of complex sentences can also help to enhance the quality of your writing.