Countries are becoming more and mote similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world.
In today's society, there
have
massive resemblances between nations around the world Verb problem
are
due to
using same
products. Personally, Correct article usage
the same
i
believe that Change the capitalization
I
this
improvement will have both negatives and positives.
On the first
hand, we can not deny Correct word choice
other
many
benefits that they give to us. Correct article usage
the many
Firstly
, it is a good way for us to access a variety of goods from other countries. Therefore
, peole's
lives will be better day by day and society is Correct your spelling
people's
also
more and more modern and developed. In addition
, people don't necessarily order the product they need on the Internet anymore. Because these products all are available in their city, they can buy whenever
they want.
Correct pronoun usage
them whenever
However
, there also
have several disadvantages. The first ine
is that they can lose their natural identity. Correct your spelling
one
line
Peole
tend to live Correct your spelling
People
the
more modern life, so they Correct article usage
a
prefer
mimic other modern Add the particle
prefer to
countries's
lives, from eating to daily activities. Remove the s
countries'
This
leads to the fact that they will gradually forget the traditional activities. Besides
, these development
Fix the agreement mistake
developments
also
will significantly impact on
the older generation. Change preposition
apply
For example
, mobile phones are becoming more and more popular with people around the world, especially young peole
, but as for the elderly, they don't have any knowledge about using phones. Correct your spelling
people
Therefore
, they need to learn how to use the phone to easily contact with
their children. Change preposition
apply
However
, using a phone is not easy so they have many difficult
in using it.
In conclusion, accessing Replace the word
difficulties
the
products from other nations is not wrong. Correct article usage
apply
However
, we should choosing
proper goods for ourselves and society, should not imitate too many modern countries.Change the verb form
choose
be choosing
Submitted by hamy152007 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear, logical structure. This includes having distinct paragraphs for the introduction, each main point, and the conclusion. Use cohesive devices such as linking words and topic sentences to guide the reader through your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Make sure your introduction clearly defines the topic and your viewpoint. The conclusion should effectively summarize your main points and restate your position without introducing new information.
Coherence & Cohesion
Support your main points with clear, detailed examples. Each paragraph should have a central idea that is expanded upon with specific information or examples.
Task Achievement
Address the prompt fully by ensuring that you answer every part of the question and elaborating on it sufficiently. Your opinions and arguments should be thoroughly explained and backed up with evidence or reasoning.
Task Achievement
Articulate your ideas clearly and make sure they are comprehensive. Avoid vague statements and ensure that your argument is easily understood.
Task Achievement
Incorporate specific examples that are directly relevant to your argument. Examples should clearly support the point you are making and be specific enough to add weight to your essay.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example