IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious problems and uses up the world's fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #air #travel #world #fuel #resources
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Traveling
Change the spelling
Travelling
show examples
through
Change preposition
by
show examples
Use synonyms
air
Add an article
the air
show examples
 is the easiest way
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 transportation.
People
Use synonyms
 use
aeroplains
Correct your spelling
aeroplanes
, private
jet
Fix the agreement mistake
jets
show examples
,
helicopter
Fix the agreement mistake
helicopters
show examples
 etc.
Although
Linking Words
 there are some believe that
travel
Use synonyms
 through
Use synonyms
air
Correct your spelling
airways
show examples
ways
Use synonyms
 bring
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of problems. They are saying that
air
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
 should be restricted
due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 and uses up the world's fuel resources. I will completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement
firstly
Linking Words
, if we want to
travel
Use synonyms
 somewhere
that is
Linking Words
 too far we must completely depend on the aeroplane
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because it goes faster than other transport
ways
Use synonyms
 or vehicles.There are some
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
Change preposition
in that
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 feel uncomfortable on
air
Use synonyms
 transport ,some
people
Use synonyms
 will vomit
while
Linking Words
 travelling in a plane,
although
Linking Words
 others have some serious problems that cannot
cure
Wrong verb form
be cured
show examples
 using medicine, and these
people
Use synonyms
 can avoid the
air
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
transpot
Correct your spelling
transport
.Talking about
Use synonyms
transpot
Correct your spelling
transport
,
for example
Linking Words
,travelling
through
Change preposition
by
show examples
sea
Add an article
the sea
show examples
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
 ships or
boat
Fix the agreement mistake
boats
show examples
 is the worst case
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 ever come across in my life.
Secondly
Linking Words
, travelling in
an aeroplanes
Correct the article-noun agreement
an aeroplane
aeroplanes
show examples
, private
jet
Fix the agreement mistake
jets
show examples
 etc have a complete impact on every
individuals
Change to a genitive case
individual's
show examples
 life. In my opinion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that
people
Use synonyms
 would not get Suffocation, because
people
Use synonyms
 are
relaying
Correct your spelling
relying
show examples
 on safe and comfortable
Use synonyms
transpot
Correct your spelling
transport
, and the one and only
Use synonyms
transpot
Correct your spelling
transport
 that
gave
Wrong verb form
gives
show examples
these quality
Change the determiner
this quality
these qualities
show examples
 is
Use synonyms
air
Correct your spelling
airways
show examples
ways
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
, there are a few having heart problems and some physical
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 they have
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 opposite impact on
this
Linking Words
.Recently,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 had come across a newspaper report about a plain incident.In that newspaper report , one lady with a heart problem was travelling
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 an indigo flight and
while
Linking Words
 in the middle of
Use synonyms
travel
Add a comma
travel,
show examples
 she felt a pain in
heart
Correct pronoun usage
her heart
show examples
 and there
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 an
air
Use synonyms
 hostess she gave some first aid that, the passenger
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 to survive to the destination. And the amazing part is that the passenger has survived. In conclusion, all the
Use synonyms
transpot
Correct your spelling
transport
 are important in different
ways
Use synonyms
.
Mainly travelling
Rephrase
Travelling
show examples
through
Change preposition
by
show examples
air
Use synonyms
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 a major role in
this
Linking Words
. Diseased or not they have to
travel
Use synonyms
 in plain if they seek
safe
Correct article usage
a safe
show examples
 and comfortable journey.
Submitted by amalsabu080 on

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structure
Ensure that there is a clear structure to the essay, with well-defined paragraphs that each focus on a specific aspect of the argument. Work on improving the logical flow from one idea to the next and maintain distinct separation between points.
connectives
Use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs. Check that pronouns and determiners refer back clearly to their antecedents.
support
Support main points with clear examples and explanations. Where relevant, draw on personal experience or external sources to add weight to your arguments.
task response
Respond directly to the task prompt and ensure that you answer all parts of the question. Provide a balanced view if required and ensure that you outline your opinion with clarity and focus throughout the essay.
language use
Refrain from repetitive language and ideas. Instead, develop your argument by adding more depth and insight into your explanations. Use precise vocabulary and varied sentence structures to convey your points effectively and to enhance readability.
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