Nowadays the way many people interact why each other has changed because of technology In what ways has technology affected the types of relation ship people make Has this become a positive or negative development?
Communication has always been a focal point of human relationships. Throughout the years we have discovered different methods to relay information to each other; From being only able to talk with each other in person to sending letters. That being said, many would say the recent advancement of technology has caused a void in many as they are not able to see each other as frequently as they could.
Technology has made it easier for us to communicate at a distance. Long gone are the days when you had to wait 3 weeks for your mail to arrive at your relative across the continent. A distant dream has now been achieved and new paths to venture open by the Internet. There is no dispute for the fact that no previous methods of communication would
not
be able to reach Rephrase
apply
this
height.
From a different point of view, sending data has never been this
reliable throughout time. There are no conceivable ways for your messages to be lost or destroyed on its
path to the receiver. When you send a message you know it Correct pronoun usage
their
would
reach your desired person in an instant fully intact. Wrong verb form
will
Also
there are no possible ways to miss Add a comma
Also,
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the address of your contact and for your message to be lost in time, as you could easily recheck with your friend or family across the Internet to see if you reached them in a correct manner.
As a final note, Wrong verb form
typing
Although
the relationships have become more artificial as time passes, There are more merits than negatives in these changes. Endless possibilities are achievable when before none were available. We should cherish these new and modern times and try to move with changes.Submitted by mohamad.sanaye462 on
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task achievement
It is clear that you made an attempt to address all parts of the task, however, the essay lacks a clear conclusion summarising your stance on whether the development is positive or negative. While you hinted at the merits outweighing the negatives, a definitive statement should be presented.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay requires improvement. Transition between paragraphs could be smoother, and the linkage of ideas could be strengthened with the use of cohesive devices. Additionally, maintaining a consistent line of argument throughout the essay would increase clarity.
task achievement
The examples provided to support your points on how technology has affected relationships are somewhat vague. Specific instances or anecdotal evidence could enhance the depth and persuasiveness of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the introduction provides a clear setup for the ensuing discussion, and the conclusion effectively summarises the main points and your stance. The introduction should preview the main points to be discussed, and the conclusion should restate your argument concisely.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.