IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the changes in food consumption by Chinese people between 1985 and 2010.

The graph below shows the changes in food consumption by Chinese people between 1985 and 2010.
The line graph illustrates
change
Correct article usage
the change
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amonth
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a month
amount
 of fish,
salt
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, and meat consumed per person and per
week
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 in China from 1985 to 2010. All in all, the
consumption
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 of fish was
most
Correct article usage
the most
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 popular item among Chinese people from the given three items.
Acoordind
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According
 to the graph, in 1985, the
consumption
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 of fish
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 the highest
intakes
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intake
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 from people in China at 600 grams.
Then
Linking Words
,
seem
Wrong verb form
it seemed
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 to fluctuate
at
Change preposition
in
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 1990
reach to
Wrong verb form
reaching
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 700
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gram
Fix the agreement mistake
grams
show examples
 per
week
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, after it
decerae
Correct your spelling
decrease
decreased
 to 600
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gram
Fix the agreement mistake
grams
show examples
 by the year 1995
However
Linking Words
, fifteen years later, it rose significantly to approximately 850
Use synonyms
gram
Fix the agreement mistake
grams
show examples
 per
week
Use synonyms
 in 2010.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the
amonth
Correct your spelling
amount
 of
salt
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 indicates nearly 500
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gram
Fix the agreement mistake
grams
show examples
 per
week
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. After which it dramatically declined to 200 grams, in 2010.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
consumption
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 of meat,
while
Linking Words
 at a relatively low level, rose significantly during
this
Linking Words
 period. By 2010 it was at the same level as the
consumption
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 of
salt
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. By 2010 it was at the same level as the
consumption
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 of
salt
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.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words salt, week, consumption, gram with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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