Some people say that the government should spend more money taking care of elderly people while others think that government spending should be spent more on the education of young people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
While
some people
believe that the government should make the care of the elderly generation a priority, others feel that it is the education of younger people
that ought to be prioritized. However
, it seems to me that both aspects of society deserve an equal amount of attention from governments. I will shed light on my opinion in the following essay.
On the one hand, lawmakers should set aside money for older. Firstly
, authorities most definitely need to provide a certain level of care for the elderly generation of their country. There are the people
who spent their lives helping build their nation and its economy to make it a better place for those who came after them. Moreover
, without the hard work of those citizens, the state would not be where it is today, and therefore
they ought to be taken care of to a certain extent, including free healthcare and medical. For example
, when they go to the hospital for examination they will have priority services for the elderly.
On the other hand
, young people
are considered the seeds of a nation’s fruitful future, as they will be the backbone of a country's economy in the future. In other words
, junior citizens are always willing to adapt to new environments, as well as
absorb and cultivate knowledge in all aspects. As a result
, it is crucial for the leadership to nurture these seeds comprehensively, especially in their academic learning, to create more opportunities for the young generation to access the essence across the globe. For instance
, encourage children to participate in skills activities so they know what areas they are talented in.
In conclusion, I argued that authorities need to focus equally on the older and younger generations. This
will benefit the development of a country.Submitted by quynhtranhbh on
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coherence cohesion
While your essay presents a logical structure, further improvement is necessary. Aim to create seamless transitions between ideas and paragraphs by utilizing a range of cohesive devices and appropriate linking words. Enhance the clarity of argument development throughout your essay.
task achievement
Your task response generally addresses the prompt, but could be improved by providing a more detailed exploration of the opposing viewpoints. Make sure your opinion is stated clearly and reiterated in the conclusion for emphasis. Incorporate specific examples to strengthen your arguments and ensure that you provide a balanced discussion of both views before conveying your stance.