IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people agree with spending lots of money on a large wedding, while others think a small wedding is a better option. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #lots #money #option
A marriage is a beautiful event and happens only once in a lifetime. Some people are willing to splurge to make it fancy and invite large numbers of groups.
Conversely
, certain couples would rather throw a smaller wedding ceremony and gather minor relatives. In my opinion, intimate weddings are the ones I prefer because there are more essential things to consider when undergoing a household. In
this
 essay, I will elaborate on my perspective
along with
 the conclusion.
To begin
 with, the outcome of money spent on social parties is not measurable.
Therefore
, people should be contemplating getting a private wedding especially if the couple has limited savings.
Moreover
, they can use their assets on honeymoons, properties, and other investments
such
 as bonds and stocks to provide a long-term return.
For instance
, my newly married sister held a low-key ceremonial wedding, where she only invited her closest family and friends.
Hence
, she could book a journey to travel the world with her husband and have a settled life because they do not allocate much funds for their wedding.
Furthermore
, there are adequate reasons to consider it as a waste of food.
At the end
 of the day, there are countless leftovers in the spot. To illustrate, my brother invited 1000 guests to his wedding but many people did not attend his wedding since it was held on a weekday.
As a result
, there was food left out and they dumped it in the garbage.
In contrast
, smaller weddings have less food, so it would be more organized and there would be no leftovers. In conclusion, think wisely before arranging a wedding without taking a toll on their bank balances.
Submitted by pnasywasina on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure the main points are well-developed with specific examples. Expand on your ideas to fully support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Strengthen coherence by creating smoother transitions and clearer links between ideas. Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: