Youth crime is increasing rapidly in many countries. Why it is increasing? and what solution can be taken to resolve the problem.
Now presently
adolescent
Fix the agreement mistake
adolescents
is
need money. Owing to numerous criminal groups Unnecessary verb
apply
arise
around the world and they suggest Wrong verb form
have arisen
to join
the groups. Change the verb form
joining
As a result
, they are losing their opportunities through this
crime.
To begin
with, teens have much more free time and they divided
Add a missing verb
are divided
two
groups positive and negative. With must be controlled and supported by parents. But they are becoming illiteracy. Change preposition
into two
Consequence
, they join criminal Replace the word
Consequently
group
and earn some money without hard work. They think the regular and nobody Fix the agreement mistake
groups
don't
complain to Change the verb form
doesn't
government
and others. Various measures can be taken to Correct article usage
the government
trouble
the problems that are certain as the population of countries Wrong verb form
troubleshoot
grow
Correct subject-verb agreement
grows
unemployment
. In fact, Replace the word
unemployed
gang
Fix the agreement mistake
gangs
involved
" he or she" and they want to be their members.
Wrong verb form
involve
Secondly
, some Youngs
lack Correct your spelling
young people
of
money and they Change preposition
apply
except
bad habits. Correct your spelling
accept
For
example
they use lying, kill, Add a comma
example,
sells
Correct subject-verb agreement
sell
drug
and others. Fix the agreement mistake
drugs
Ones
Replace the word
One
want
to spend time Correct subject-verb agreement
wants
Change preposition
on simpl
simpl
activities. Correct your spelling
simple
Furthermore
, they use lying, killers, sells
Wrong verb form
selling
drug
and other ways. Today many people are worried about crime, Fix the agreement mistake
drugs
in addition
, bad experience
from childhood Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
builds
Fix the agreement mistake
build
and
rage in Correct word choice
apply
the
human Correct article usage
apply
being
that can result Fix the agreement mistake
beings
dangerous
. On the one hand, we must be Correct word choice
in danger
awareness
and control child's Replace the word
aware
behavior
when they are growing up namely our family don't happen, browse and a silly Change the spelling
behaviour
burgarly
. In my opinion effective solution.
Correct your spelling
burglary
To conclude
, I fully support the view. We need to supervise and care until the girl or boy becomes independent.Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on
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logical structure
The essay does not present a clear or logical structure. Consider using a more organized approach by introducing the topic, presenting ideas each in their separate paragraphs, and concluding effectively.
introduction conclusion present
An introduction and conclusion are present, but they lack clarity and strength. Aim for an engaging introduction that clearly states the topic and your position, and a conclusion that effectively summarises your main points and relates back to the topic.
supported main points
Main points are mentioned but not supported adequately. Develop each point with clear explanations, reasons, and examples.
complete response
The response to the task is incomplete and lacks depth. Address the causes of youth crime and provide clearly elaborated solutions to resolve the problem.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ideas are present but not conveyed clearly and comprehensively. Work on expressing your thoughts in a well-articulated and understandable manner.
relevant specific examples
The essay contains very limited specific examples to support the arguments. Use relevant and concrete examples to strengthen your points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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