IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some feel that it is impossible for a country to be economically progressive and environmentally friendly at the same time. Others disagree with this view. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#feel #country #time
It is discussed by a part of society thinks that,economic
growt
Correct your spelling
growth
 damages
environment
.Another group of people oppose and consider that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
this topics
Change the determiner
this topic
these topics
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 are totally unrelated to each other. I will discuss both sides in
this
 essay below. Industry is
the
Correct article usage
apply
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one of the most important
factor
Change to a plural noun
factors
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 which develops of country's economy. With production,
export
Fix the agreement mistake
exports
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 will increase and unemployment will decrease. And
also
 you don't need to import from the other countries. Nowadays,
mostly
Rephrase
most
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 big industry
companies
 care about sustainability and
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
.
Environment
companies
 are auditing the factories and give them
certificate
Fix the agreement mistake
certificates
show examples
 of conformity.
Therefore
,
companies
 must care about
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
 because of their interests. Currently, climate activists are popular and very interesting. They can protest to negative conditions and appeal
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 public and press.
Hence
, factory owners or investors must care about
environment
Add an article
the environment
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.
Besides
, most governments support their public about sustainability and
environment
Replace the word
environmental
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 protection.
Fox
Correct your spelling
For
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 example; trash bins are
seperated
Correct your spelling
separated
according to
type
Add an article
the type
a type
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 of waste. And
also
 most
of
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apply
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beverage
companies
 prefer glass
instead
 of plastic bottles.
In
Change preposition
On
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 the other hand,
energy
 is the most important requirement for
continous
Correct your spelling
continuous
 production. Unfortunately,
although
 sun
energy
 is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 friendly
energy
, there are
no
Correct your spelling
not
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 many sun
energy
 investments in countries. Still
mostly
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most
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 countries are using
the
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apply
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coal
for produces
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to produce
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energy
, because
of
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apply
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it is cheaper than other
energy
 options. But coal
energy
 causes air and
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 pollution. In
conlusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, each particular ideas have its own agreements and disagreements. My opinion is
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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 is a heritage which we bring to our kids and
grandchilds
Correct your spelling
grandchildren
show examples
. So,we must leave
clean
Correct article usage
a clean
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 and
healty
Correct your spelling
healthy
environment
 to the people after us.
Submitted by mervekerkuklu on

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Introduction & Conclusion
Make sure your introduction clearly presents the topic and includes a thesis statement that outlines the main ideas you will discuss.
Logical Structure
Work on creating a clearer logical structure by organizing your ideas into well-defined paragraphs, each with a clear topic sentence.
Supporting Main Points
Support your main points with specific examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments and make them more persuasive.
Complete Response
Ensure you respond fully to the task by discussing both views thoroughly and giving a well-developed personal opinion.
Clear Comprehensive Ideas
Clarify your ideas by developing them more comprehensively with clear arguments and explanations.
Relevant Specific Examples
Include more relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points better and make your essay more engaging for the reader.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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