Some people think children should do extra-classes after school. Others disagree and say they should play sports outside their school hours. What is your opinion on this? Suggest healthy ways for children to develop.

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Despite the belief held by some that
children
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do extra
classes
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after
school
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,others claim they have to practice any sort of exercise after
school
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. I agree with
this
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.
This
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essay will delve into the details that can assist
children
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in having good health,
in addition
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to my opinion that will be elucidated with the aim of
this
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.
To begin
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with,any sort of exercise, whether vigorous or flexible, by and large has positive impacts on our stamina. Not only
this
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,but it
also
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, to a great extent, improves our mental health.
According to
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a panel of experts assembled by N.H.S. experts. So as to have a robust body
as well as
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productive behaviour for the
children
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, what the
school
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administrations have to do is increase the hours of working-out exercises.
For instance
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, in Japan, the
children
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play sports after
school
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classes
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instead
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of doing extra
classes
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. It is
also
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interesting to note that some chronic diseases are, to some extent, caused by obesity. Despite
this
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fact, if you work out, you are not vulnerable to these kinds of diseases. On account of the fact that, in a procedure to save our
children
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,what the parents
as well as
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school
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authorities have to do is urge our
children
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to play any type of sport. For those who are committed to their desks
in addition
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to homework,what they should do is make a
stricke
Correct your spelling
strict
balance between their health and their
school
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requirements. To elucidate
this
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, take Ealing
School
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in London as a clear example. The sporting
time
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of the pupils is higher than their studying
time
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.
Hence
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, these arguments collectively persuade me that it is very pivotal for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children
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to play any kind of sport after
school
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time
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instead
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of increasing the class
time
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. In a nutshell,
while
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it is believed by some that
children
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have to work out any sort of exercise after
school
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,others claim
children
Use synonyms
have to do extra
classes
Use synonyms
after
school
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. I disagree with
this
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,though. On account of the aforementioned justifications.
Submitted by nadeenelkenawy4425 on

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Introduction/Conclusion
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are clear and distinct. The introduction should provide a preview of the discussion, and the conclusion should summarise the main points without introducing new ideas.
Cohesion & Logic
Use logical connectors and transitions to improve the flow of ideas from one paragraph to another. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea that is developed coherently.
Relevance & Examples
Expand on supporting ideas by providing concrete examples that are directly relevant to your argument. The examples should be specific and well-explained to enhance the clarity of your main points.
Task Fulfillment
Ensure that your response fully addresses the prompt. Provide a balanced discussion where your opinion is clear and supported by arguments. Both sides of the issue should be covered even if you are taking a clear stance.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • complement
  • curriculum
  • personalized attention
  • holistic development
  • resilience
  • balanced lifestyle
  • well-rounded development
  • faculties
  • socially adept
  • creative arts
  • outdoor exploration
  • empathetic
  • adaptable
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