Increasing housing problem in big city is a social consequences. Some people say that only government can solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, popularity is increasing quickly, especially in developing countries, which leads to the request for accommodation

also

Linking Words

developing fast.

People

Use synonyms

tend to move to urban areas to work and study because of their utilities, which causes overcrowding in big cities. Some

people

Use synonyms

argue that only the government can tackle

this

Linking Words

issue. In my view, I partly support

this

Linking Words

opinion because of the following reasons. On the one hand, I believe that the government has the highest responsibility to solve

this

Linking Words

problem because they create policies and rules to develop the country. They should discuss encouraging citizens to live in other areas

instead

Linking Words

of focusing on the same places. In

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

underdeveloped provinces, local

people

Use synonyms

need support for housing, finance, education and so on, which helps them have good conditions to live

Change preposition

in.

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, in Vietnam, domestic communities, who live in mountainous regions, are supported with accommodation, food and water

while

Linking Words

children don't pay any fee for education.

On the other hand

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

should contribute their ability to decrease the pressure of metropolises. After students have done an education program,

instead

Linking Words

of staying there, local

people

Use synonyms

can come back to their province to develop their hometown. In reality, there are lots of students chosen and succeeded with that path. With the above solution, popularity will go down in big cities leading to a decrease in the request for accommodation.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the government only sets policies and to have good results, we need the support of the residents In conclusion, the increasing housing problem in big cities is a serious issue, it causes many negative consequences negatively for everyone.

Therefore

Linking Words

, all

people

Use synonyms

need to join hands to solve it.

Submitted by duongntt.tld on Wed Dec 27 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each body paragraph has a clear main idea, and consistently develop that idea with specific examples and explanations throughout the paragraph.

coherence cohesion

Use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more naturally and enhance the flow of your writing.

task achievement

Fully address all parts of the task by providing a balanced view on the extent to which you agree or disagree, and reinforce your position in the conclusion.

task achievement

Support your main points with specific, detailed examples that are fully developed and directly relevant to the central arguments of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Be mindful of spelling, word choice, and sentence structure to avoid errors that can obscure the intended meaning or create confusion.

task achievement

Review the use of 'popularity' in the context of your essay, as it might have been a typographical error for 'population'. Correct terminology is essential for clarity and precision.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

277 words

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Increasing housing problem in big city is a social consequences. Some people say that only government can solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people believe that technological tools such as body scanners and CCTV have significantly enhanced our safety and security, while others feel that they have resulted in a loss of privacy. Do the benefits of these items outweigh their disadvantages?

Some people think that it is better for a country's economy for people to spend money while others believe that it would be better for people to save money. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission outweigh the disadvantages?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some school leavers choose to travel or work for a year before going to university. What might be the reasons for this? What are the disadvantages of this practice? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.