Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give the reasons and relative examples upon your own experiences.

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Business has always been considered a cut-throat competition in which enterprises relentlessly make a huge effort to attract customers and gain profit. In order to build a customer base, numerous corporations these days introduce that their

products

Use synonyms

are innovative in some aspects.

While

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such

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practices have their own merits and demerits, I strongly support that these promotions indicate a positive development in the industry, which will be

further

Linking Words

explained by discussing the root causes of

this

Linking Words

trend in the following essay.

Firstly

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, modern people tend to try out new things to satisfy their curiosity. Understanding

this

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thinking,

therefore

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, a number of companies stress

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the innovations of their prominent goods as a good way to appeal to more and more shoppers to rebuild the customer base to recover from losses caused by economic depressions, especially after the COVID-19 pandemic.

For instance

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, numerous publishers

as well as

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Kim Dong, and Nha Nam annually release new versions of their previous books with innovations

such

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as hardcore versions, novels with illustrations, and new book covers,...

Due to

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the fact that these unique versions have been sold out quickly,

this

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business strategy proves its beneficial influence.

Secondly

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, we can consider

this

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practice as a positive development owning to the benefits which it brings

such

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as a wide range of choices and the accessibility of the latest well-qualified

products

Use synonyms

. Since consumers prefer prominent and trendy

products

Use synonyms

, businesses are forced to improve the quality of their merchandise and showcase superior value

in contrast

Linking Words

to other opponents in the trade market.

Moreover

Linking Words

this

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trend is

also

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associated with a motivation to upgrade the technology and encourage imaginative creators to have their creative initiative come to being.

Therefore

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this

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business strategy is not only advantageous for consumers, but

also

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the producers. In conclusion, the trend in which corporations concentrate on the innovation of their latest

products

Use synonyms

in advertising responds to the companies’ effort to appeal to more and more shoppers. To my mind, these actions can ultimately be regarded as a fundamental development that improves the customer experience and makes remarkable changes to the industry

jakelong16091994Wed Dec 27 2023

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task achievement

Ensure that your essay directly addresses the prompt given. Your essay should discuss the roles that parents and schools play in teaching children to be good members of society. Re-focus your essay to align with the initial topic. Your current discussion on business practices and innovation is off-topic and does not address the given task.

coherence cohesion

Organize your essay into clear paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Use cohesive devices to connect ideas and paragraphs effectively. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all supporting sentences are relevant to this main idea.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

347 words

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