IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays the importance of teachers is diminishing due to increased availability of alternative resources to students. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

#importance #teachers #availability #alternative #resources #students
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
the
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apply
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modern society with the developed technologies, the educational system faces a
lot
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 of changes. Several
people
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 assert that
teachers
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 no longer are considered
as
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apply
show examples
the
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apply
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essentials for students because they can get the same quality of learning from various
of
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apply
show examples
alternative resources. I totally agree with the statement.
However
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, there are still a
lot
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 of
people
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 who claim that the necessity of
teachers
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 can not be replaced by anything yet. These
people
Use synonyms
 usually highlight that students learn academic subjects from
teachers
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 but
also
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 social skills and
ettiques
Correct your spelling
antiques
,which are the most important things that
people
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 should learn from their school age.
Nevertheless
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, It is true that the meaning of the
existance
Correct your spelling
existence
 of
teachers
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 is less important in modern society. The main reason why
i
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I
show examples
 thought that
teachers
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 were essential for our
teenage
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teenagers
show examples
 in the past is because they taught us
the
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apply
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specific academic subjects.
However
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, there are tons of resources that we can utilize for studying
in
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apply
show examples
these days. These alternative methods can be online
course
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courses
show examples
 or even a
Youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
show examples
 video. There are a
lot
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 of advantages that we can get from these.
First,
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we can get easy
excess
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access
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 to huge categories of studies that
Correct article usage
the internets
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internets
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internet
show examples
 collected from everywhere.
For example
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, there are
limited
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a limited
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 amount of
informations
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information
pieces of information
show examples
 that a teacher can be prepared for a class.
However
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
alternative methods
such
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 as online tutors or
Youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
show examples
 videos can utilize
unlimited
Add an article
an unlimited
show examples
 range of knowledge that
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 collected from the database built over decades.
As a result
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, these can be more efficient and convenient for us to study. In conclusion, It is true that
teachers
Use synonyms
 still are helpful for us to learn a
lot
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 of things.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 the importance has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
decreased since
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
developed
techonolgy
Correct your spelling
technology
 can replace the role of
teachers
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by pjh011205 on

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Introduction
Ensure that the introduction sets a clear framework for the argument and includes a direct response to the essay prompt.
Logical Structure
A logical structure should be followed throughout, with clear topic sentences that introduce the points in each paragraph, followed by explanation and example.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to clearly link ideas and paragraphs.
Task Achievement
Fully address all parts of the task by providing a balanced discussion that includes both sides of the argument and concludes with a well-reasoned position.
Grammar & Accuracy
Avoid spelling and grammatical errors to ensure clear communication of ideas.
Examples & Evidence
Incorporate relevant, specific examples to strengthen the main points of your argument and demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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