In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extant do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Innovation in technology enables
people
to get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information through
e-book
Fix the agreement mistake
e-books
show examples
,
online
Correct word choice
and online
show examples
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
, without buying printed
newspapers
or books. Unfortunately, there are still some reasons that
people
in the future will still need hard
file
Fix the agreement mistake
files
show examples
to get knowledge or news,
such
as isolated
location
Fix the agreement mistake
locations
show examples
and health
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
.
This
essay will explain why printed
newspapers
and
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
are still needed in reading.
Firstly
, rural
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a clear
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
where
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
cannot not be always accessed by local
village
Fix the agreement mistake
villages
show examples
.
Moreover
, there are only some groups of
people
, high-pay
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
show examples
,
have
Correct pronoun usage
who have
show examples
gadget
Fix the agreement mistake
gadgets
show examples
like smartphones or laptops for serving information on the website or
open
Wrong verb form
opening
show examples
the e-book.
This
means, printed
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
will be useful and needed by villagers and importantly students at school.
Moreover
, local council officers will need hard
file
Fix the agreement mistake
files
show examples
of
newspapers
to know what is new in the city.
That is
because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
there might be not all local council
office
Fix the agreement mistake
offices
show examples
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
remote
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
have
Correct pronoun usage
that have
show examples
access to the internet
due to
the lack of electronic tools and environmental
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
.
For instance
, if electricity is limited, it means that they would not be able to open the smartphone even though they have
e-book
Fix the agreement mistake
e-books
show examples
on their
gadget
and they will still have to pay the cost of
internet
Correct article usage
an internet
show examples
connection.
Secondly
, Screening
time
would affect human eyes. Dry eyes might be caused
people
Change preposition
by people
show examples
spend
Wrong verb form
spending too
show examples
much
time
in front of
gadget
Correct article usage
a gadget
show examples
screen.
Other
Change the wording
Another
show examples
threat
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
causes
Wrong verb form
caused
show examples
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
screen
time
is blue-ray radiation which is harmful to
human
Add an article
the human
show examples
body like cancer.
This
should be considered in using smartphones or any other gadgets in order to avoid negative
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
on screen
time
. In another situation, if
elderly
Correct article usage
the elderly
show examples
who
wants
Correct subject-verb agreement
want
show examples
to read a
news paper
Correct your spelling
newspaper
show examples
are unable to operate their
gadget
as their ability to use the tool is limited.
Furthermore
, their vision function is starting to be weaker because of health
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
. In conclusion,
it is clear that
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
will still need access to printed
newspapers
and books in the future as
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
all
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
able to open a
gadget
.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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task achievement
Your essay shows an understanding of the topic and provides some arguments to support your view. However, responses should be further developed with more detailed explanations and a deeper analysis of the topic. It is also important to fully address all parts of the prompt to achieve a higher score in this criterion. Consider expanding your ideas and exploring the topic with greater depth and insight.
coherence cohesion
While you have attempted to logically structure your essay and include an introduction and conclusion, the cohesion between ideas can be improved. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs should be smoother, and it is important to ensure that each paragraph clearly focuses on one main idea. Additionally, using a variety of cohesive devices can help to link your ideas more effectively. Investing time in refining these aspects of your writing will enhance the coherence and overall flow of your essay.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • cost-effective
  • cultural value
  • sentimental value
  • reliability
  • distracting
  • access to
  • digital devices
  • internet
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