The charts below compare the age structure of the populations of France and India in 1984.

The charts below compare the age structure of the populations of France and India in 1984.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The charts below compare the age structure of the populations of France and India in 1984.
The charts presented here contrast the percentage of French with the one of
Indians
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according to
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sex and age in 1984.
Overall
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, we can observe that the population in India, especially among young people, was very large. But the number of
Indians
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decreases considerably when they get old.
By contrast
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, in France the number of inhabitants was less important,
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however
Add a comma
however,
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they lived longer.
First,
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in the Asian country, the young population of males and females is larger than in France. As we can see, in the first chart, between 0 and 15, the bracket is about 3 and 4.
While
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in the other chart, in the same period, the percentage is about 6 and 7. After that, it evens out because in the two diagrams we can distinguish that at 40 and 45
cohort
Fix the agreement mistake
cohorts
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, the bracket is 3.
Nevertheless
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,
French
Correct article usage
the French
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live longer than
Use synonyms
Indians
Correct article usage
the Indians
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. After 45, the rate of
Indians
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fell a lot. It began at 3 % and it dropped to 1%
for
Change preposition
at
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70. It is the same case for inhabitants of the European country but the population has decreased less. It began with
also
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3% but it dropped to only 2%.
Moreover
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, we have data for 85 for French and we don’t have more brackets after 70 for
Indians
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.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Replace the words indians with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decreases" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • charts
  • age structure
  • populations
  • France
  • India
  • 1984
  • overall
  • different
  • evenly distributed
  • proportion
  • young people
  • elderly individuals
  • largest age group
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