Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. What is your opinion? Write your response not less than 250 words. You get 40 minutes to complete this task
Advertisements
plays
a significant role in our daily basis. Change the verb form
play
However
, People are divided in their opinion reagarding
Commercials Correct your spelling
regarding
are
motivating them to purchase unwanted products or whether Unnecessary verb
apply
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
gives
us knowledge of Correct subject-verb agreement
give
up to date
items to live a better life. In Add a hyphen
up-to-date
this
essay
I will look at both sides of the argument and give my opinion with suitable examples.
To embark on, advertisement have numerous benefits which can help Add a comma
essay,
consumer
gain a lot of information about any commodity they need to purchase. Fix the agreement mistake
consumers
For Instance
, if a Person with very less
knowledge about the latest technology wants to buy a Correct word choice
little
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
Smart Phone
an advert would be very beneficial to identify which would be the best one with all Correct your spelling
smartphone
updated
features and Correct article usage
the updated
particulary
more famous in the market. Correct your spelling
particularly
Hence
, Commercial has a great impact on buying choices especially
for Add the comma(s)
, especially
the
unaware consumers.
Correct article usage
apply
Further
and even more importantly, It encourages people on saving
their valuable time and money. One Change preposition
to save
paticularly
good exampleCorrect your spelling
particularly
,
is when a Remove the comma
apply
yound
couple wants to get a helping hand to clean their house without doing much of Correct your spelling
young
household
chores they would look for Correct article usage
the household
a
advertisement Change the article
an
of
a Robot Vaccum Cleaner which can do the work for them Change preposition
for
also
when they plan on saving their hard earned
money when doing monthly grocery shopping the discounts and sales page Add a hyphen
hard-earned
diaplayed
on their daily newspaper will be of great help to protect their wallet.
Correct your spelling
displayed
On the
Contrary
, in some Fix capitalization
contrary
cases
it Add a comma
cases,
also
makes naive customers consume more than they require and automatically changes their wants into need
. Fix the agreement mistake
needs
In other words
, Kids nowadays make their folk shop for MacDonald
happy meal because there is a hidden toy in it which they can enjoy with the unhealthy food included without a good exhibit or display of the same Children would have no idea about the toy and so even if they are not hungry they will still buy the Happy Meal to play with they Change noun form
MacDonald's
suprise
present in it. Correct your spelling
surprise
Hence
, it makes their parents spend more on things which were not required also
affecting their health.
By the way of Conclusion, I believe that Commercials inspire and enchnace
people's lives by the means of keeping them updated with Correct your spelling
enhance
the
new technology and money savings Correct article usage
apply
commodity
. But it Fix the agreement mistake
commodities
also
have
some detrimental effects which Change the verb form
has
needs
to be addressed as well.Change the verb form
need
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coherence cohesion
You need to work on providing a clearer and more logical structure to your essay. While an introduction and conclusion are present, they could be more effectively crafted to guide the reader through your argument. Additionally, consider organizing your paragraphs with topic sentences and clear transitions to improve coherence.
task achievement
Make sure your response fully addresses all parts of the task. The response should have a clear position throughout the essay, but it was somewhat undermined by grammatical errors and ambiguous statements. Work on expressing your ideas more clearly and ensure your argument is comprehensive, always linking back to the essay prompt.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.