Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In contemporary
society
, the functions of
music
have consistently been a topic of interest among the masses. The statement that
music
is the ideal way to bring
people
of different backgrounds together.
While
there are compelling arguments in favour of
this
perspective, there are
also
significant reasons to approach it with scepticism. Despite its contentious nature, I am inclined to endorse the viewpoint, as I believe
music
can truly fill the gap between
society
and make the whole community live in harmony.
It is clear that
music
from different countries or regions would have different languages and manifestations.
Although
there are huge cultural diversities between nation and nation, the rhythm can take the place of delivering the emotion and thoughts of composers and singers.
For instance
, in the past two decades,
people
in Taiwan preferred listening to Taiwanese songs to listening to other languages' songs
due to
the problem of eluding languages.
However
, because of the international and more attractive and diverse performances, K-pop became a popular trend among Taiwanese teenagers. We can even see some videos on social media that are elders dancing to Korean
music
. It is
therefore
reasonable that even though we can not fully understand the meaning of
music
the energy and happiness behind the song can still completely perform and certainly bring
people
together. In my opinion, I deeply believe the significant part of
music
is
people
. No matter the way that singers sing or the dance that accompanies the song,
people
can feel the subtle emotion behind every single word or note. Individuals with different growing backgrounds or different ages both have feelings,
although
the touching point of individuals might be different the moving will convey between person and person and the more sharings in the
society
the fewer fights will happen.
This
insight underscores the complexity of the issue and supports that
music
can bring
people
together. In conclusion, reflecting upon the statement that
music
can play an important role in
society
is evidence that the issue is accurate. My allegiance that
music
can bring the community together no matter different ages or cultures is steadfastly consolidated and remains incontrovertibly firm.
Submitted by jasmine2001tw on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea that is developed with specific support.
coherence cohesion
Use a mixture of simple and complex sentence structures to add fluency to your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words to improve the connections between paragraphs and sentences, ensuring a smoother flow of ideas.
task achievement
Fully address all parts of the task to ensure that your position is clear and the response is complete. Make sure your opinion is consistent throughout the essay.
task achievement
Support your ideas with more detailed and relevant examples to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Develop paragraphs fully to elaborate on your main points, which will create a more comprehensive response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
What to do next:
Look at other essays: