effort. At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the numebr of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvanatges?
There is ongoing contention about whether countries comprising a large number of younger generations have more advantages rather than the majority of the population being elderly
people
.
This
essay will argue that having a high percentage of younger people
is more likely to benefit countries, as it contributes to a strong workforce and also
reduces medical expenses within the nations.
To begin
, the young can immensely give impetus to the workforce in society. According to
a static, more than 65 per cent of the labour force in a country is made up of 22 to 40 years of adults on average, which indicates that it would have a detrimental effect on the GDP of countries without leaning on them. In particular
, under the circumstances where there has been fierce international competition in a myriad of fields, turning to the younger generations would be of paramount importance. Furthermore
, the elderly are more vulnerable and prone to illnesses, which often results in additional burdens in society.
However
, there might be concern about the safety of society in general with the younger populations increasing. For instance
, an area, in which many younger adults are residing, has a tendency to have a high crime rate. In this
instance, although
it may pose a threat to the community around the place, this
insecurity would be mitigated by enforcing a more rigid law and security system.
In conclusion, while
there might be a likelihood of causing a high crime rate due to
an increasing number of young people
, there would be several solutions to address it. Nevertheless
, looking at the perspective of undermining the workforce as well as
older citizens’ medical expenses, the issue can be considered to be more intricate, therefore
a high population of younger people
is more advantageous than its counterpart.Submitted by artical5er7 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure clear logical sequencing of your main points. Avoid jumping between ideas without clear transitions.
coherence cohesion
Include an introduction and conclusion that clearly state your view and summarise the main points of the essay. The conclusion should reiterate your overall stance without introducing new arguments.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph should center around one main idea, and this should be supported by specific examples and clearer development of ideas.
task achievement
Provide a complete response to the task, ensuring you address all parts of the prompt thoroughly.
task achievement
Develop ideas comprehensively by explaining each advantage or disadvantage and providing exact reasons and illustrations.
task achievement
Use relevant, specific examples to support your arguments. These examples should be clear and directly linked to the ideas you present.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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