some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes ( for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children).

Many people say that unpaid
community
services
should be a compulsory part of school programs . I agree with
this
statement and
further
in
this
essay, I will explain why these
services
should be included in the syllabus.
To begin
with, If the young generation is involved in
Community
services
then
it will not only help them to enhance their skill but it help them to understand their duties towards the nation.
Community
services
give chance to students to learn the awareness of necessary things and to become more attentive to basic responsibilities.
For instance
,
In
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a recent survey done by the time of U.S magazine, revealed that 80 per cent of the young generations in Japan are extremely happy to help the government to participate in social
activities
which is why Japan's economy is too high and a developed nation too.
Likewise
, Many developed countries provide
community
helping
services
along with
the high school curriculum.
Secondly
, leadership skills
along with
responsibility towards the country ,our elders will
also
be developed among youths if they are actively involved in
community
-based
services
i.e. painting walls , helping in NGO etc , teaching poor kids etc is far better for school children who is wasting their spare time in playing video games on mobile .
For example
, In Sweden, the young generation helps the country's army in unpaid
community
helping
activities
i.e. plantation,free medical checks
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
etc. . Sweden is in the third number among other countries and it has a good economy too.
To conclude
, No doubt , that unpaid
Community
helping
activities
will help individuals enhance their skills , and personalities and
also
help in
overall
development . I believe that the government should include these
activities
as a part of the curriculum .
Submitted by preetiaug25 on

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introduction conclusion present
Introduction lacks a clear thesis statement which is a pivotal part of the essay structure. Introduction and conclusion should clearly reflect the main argument for better cohesion.
supported main points
Main ideas should be supported with more specific and varied examples for each point. Avoid overgeneralisation and ensure examples are directly linked to the points being made.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure a clear and comprehensive response to the question by addressing why it should be compulsory instead of primarily focusing on the benefits.
relevant specific examples
Include real-world examples to substantiate your arguments, making them more relevant and persuasive.
logical structure
Ensure each paragraph contains a central idea and that each of these is connected to form a cohesive argument throughout the essay. A clear logical flow is important.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • compulsory
  • high school programmes
  • unpaid community service
  • charity
  • improving the neighbourhood
  • teaching sports
  • sense of responsibility
  • empathy
  • broader perspective
  • societal issues
  • college applications
  • job applications
  • positive impact
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