Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Write at least 250 words.
With the ever-increasing number of
people
, they believe that parents
should bear the responsibility to teach the
Change the word
their
children
to become contributing members
in
society. Others maintain that Change preposition
of
school
can be the best place to reshape the learning of the
qualified Correct article usage
apply
members
. In view of the socialization process, I think the parents
should be the best opinion to teach the students
who contribute to society more and become outstanding people
in society.
First of all, the main initiative of suggesting why a person is taught by the parents
to learn to become a good member is a
primary socialization. It is no longer to say that Remove the article
apply
parents
are essential and role models to kids
and children
. Parents
can bear the identity or images of their kids
when they are young. In addition
, parents
not only understand their own children
's personality and characters,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
impact students
' own values and beliefs more easily. For example
, It is no exaggeration to say that parents
can not only become role models (like in the volunteer
training) ,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
become the experience
of being a volunteer
and helping others. There is no doubt that the parents
can showcase the
positive identity if Correct article usage
a
kids
will
receive the Verb problem
apply
volunteer
experience
with parents
during early childhood stages and thereby have the chances
Fix the agreement mistake
chance
of learning
by osmosis. Change preposition
to learn
Therefore
, parents
are essence
or first social Correct article usage
the essence
agent
for acting and becoming Fix the agreement mistake
agents
the
good Correct article usage
apply
member
.
Fix the agreement mistake
members
Then
, despite
the Change preposition
apply
parents
can accept the responsibility of providing students
to learn as the
good social Correct article usage
apply
members
. Certainly, the school
is necessary and to somewhat extent
the ability Add a comma
extent,
of teaching
Replace the preposition
to teach
students
contributes to how to become a good member. It is widely acknowledged that schools can either provide the service learning
course or programmeAdd a hyphen
service-learning
,
or offer the Remove the comma
apply
volunteer
experience
no
limits to the government , non-government Change preposition
with no
organization
(Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
NGO
) and private sectors. The more Fix the agreement mistake
NGOs
volunteer
experience
students
gain, the more authority and department people
will receive to invite
by the Wrong verb form
be invited
school
co-organisation. The school
indeed has the
micro-society concepts, Correct article usage
apply
with
providing many kinds and types of Change preposition
apply
students
who play as the
social Correct article usage
apply
members
. Different students
can play the
significant role Correct article usage
a
to collaborate
with each other and perform the advantage of personality, like the facilitator, collaborator, Change preposition
in collaborating
volunteer
. If the Correct word choice
and volunteer
students
can have time and availability, still, students
will have
Rephrase
still have
chance
to plan Correct article usage
a chance
students-initiative
and Correct your spelling
student-initiative
students-led
Correct your spelling
student-led
project
to have team-basis Fix the agreement mistake
projects
volunteer
work more frequent
, Change the word
frequently
regular
and standard.
Change the word
regularly
Finally
, it can be concluded from the discussion that the responsibility of teaching students
to become good people
or members
. There is no limit to cultivating students
' personality and character, but also
the chances of having the volunteer
and service learning experience
to teach students
help
others by using the Add the particle
to help
students
own Change to a genitive case
student's
students'
ability
. Yet, it would be better if the Fix the agreement mistake
abilities
parents
taught children
and kids
more easily as long as they were familiar with the children
's characteristics and personalities.Submitted by asllchkied on
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task achievement
The essay attempts to discuss both views and provide an opinion, but the task response could be improved by ensuring that the opinion is presented earlier in the essay and clearly stated. Make sure to address the task directly and fully.
coherence cohesion
The logical sequencing of information is inconsistent, making it difficult to follow the argument at times. Work on the flow of ideas with clear and logical connectors. Additionally, separating the text into clear paragraphs would greatly enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
Provide clear introduction and conclusion sections to frame your essay effectively. The introduction should clearly outline the views discussed, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize the arguments and restate your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Main points should be supported with relevant examples or explanations. Try to use specific and concrete examples to illustrate your points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.