Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later. Some say that these are the best people to talk to school students about the dangers of committing a crime? Do you agree or disagree?
It is a common belief that some offenders become kind residents and should be talking to children so that they are aware of the prices we have to pay when guilting. From my perspective, I firmly agree with
this
idea. Therefore
, the following essay will shed light on this
point.
To begin
with, a resident who is improved after being arrested in prison should be speaking with youngsters to educate them about moral values. Moreover
, the realistic and particular stories are easy to avertissement with the young generation about the consequences when committing a crime. The reason I have to say that is
wrongdoers receive many disadvantages. First of all, the community usually tends to discriminate against this
group of people owing to the wrong attitudes they met in the past. Furthermore
, prisons have a serious impact on physical and mental health, especially psychological due to
the ability to prevent diseases and stress significantly decreased
. Verb problem
apply
For example
, to reduce potentially harmful behaviors
, managers of each prison implement some dangerous methods to limit those actions, Change the spelling
behaviours
hence
these activities can make criminals obsessed.
Additionally
, lawbreakers meet diverse difficulties in life financial. On account of this
, it will be a burden and pressure simply because finding opportunities for a career will grow more difficult. It is evidenced throughout various corporations do not recruit a criminal for their companies. Besides
that, a bad reputation can saved and passed down. Thus
, the next generations can be influenced by the mistakes of their forefathers. For instance
, some enterprises disagree that a person have parents or grandparents are felons.
In conclusion, malefactors have to suffer from numerous injuries such
as discrimination, harm to material and spiritual, hard in looking for a job and having a terrible influence on their children.Submitted by quynhtranhbh on
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coherence cohesion
The essay needs better logical structure with clearer connections between the main points. Introduce each paragraph with a topic sentence that relates directly to the thesis statement and ensure subsequent sentences build coherently on this point. There seems to be some repetition and lack of clear flow between ideas which could be improved with better signposting and linking words.
task achievement
Your response touches upon relevant points concerning the topic, but at times veers towards being repetitive and slightly off-topic. Make sure to address the prompt directly by developing the arguments around whether former prisoners should talk to school students about crime. Including specific examples that directly support your argument would enhance task achievement.