Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their doctors . Do you this this is a positive or negative development ?

Many people these days who have medical
illness
Fix the agreement mistake
illnesses
show examples
are searching to use different toy of medicine and
treatment
from their friends
instead
of booking
appointment
Fix the agreement mistake
appointments
show examples
with the medical profession .
However
, in
this
essay , I
would explained
Wrong verb form
will explain
show examples
both views supported by examples and will provide my own opinion . To initiate
this
essay , one of the positives to
visit
Wrong verb form
visiting
show examples
physician
Correct article usage
a physician
show examples
looking for specific
treatment
and prescription is that to receive an ideal
treatment
, investigate bold
account
Fix the agreement mistake
accounts
show examples
to determine the disease .
Therefore
, the doctor can
prescribed
Change the verb form
prescribe
show examples
proper drugs with suitable
dose
Fix the agreement mistake
doses
show examples
according to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gender , age , and weight as well.
In addition
, the profession could follow up
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
case to avoid any future complications .
However
, all
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
of health
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
show examples
should be monitored and identified by medical doctors . On
their
Change the word
the
show examples
other hand , some people
are prefer
Change the verb form
prefer
show examples
to have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
alternative medicines and
treatment
from other experiences which is not applicable for all persons and not
induced
Wrong verb form
induce
show examples
recover
Replace the word
recovery
show examples
from their complaints .
Moreover
, one point
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
worth
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
mentioning is these traditional medicines might
be affected
Wrong verb form
affect
show examples
on person’s’ main organs
such
as
heart
Correct article usage
the heart
show examples
, liver , kidney and lungs .
As a result
, might be disturbed body hormones and enzymes as well .
Furthermore
,
complication
Fix the agreement mistake
complications
show examples
sooner or later might
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
happen and the person will suffer all the time . In Conclusion , due. To many drawbacks
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
using alternative cures and might be harmful and more benefits from using
chemical measured
Add a hyphen
chemical-measured
show examples
medicines with
doctor’s
Correct article usage
a doctor’s
show examples
observation.
However
, from my perspective , I will support acquired
treatment
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
visiting medical clinics .
Submitted by dr.marwa on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay is well-structured, with clear paragraphing and logical sequence of ideas. Use cohesive devices effectively to link ideas within and across paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Stick to a clear, direct style of writing to minimize the risk of grammatical errors and ensure clarity. Utilize a range of sentence structures for a more sophisticated style.
coherence cohesion
Develop each main point in the body paragraphs with relevant examples and explanations to fully support your arguments. Use specific illustrations to make your point clearer to the reader.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task by providing a balanced view. Ensure that you cover both sides of the argument if the question asks for it and give your own opinion with clear reasons.
task achievement
Demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the topic with clear development of ideas. Make sure to explain each point sufficiently to meet the word count requirement while staying relevant.
task achievement
Provide clear and relevant examples to support your arguments. These examples should be well-integrated into your discussion and should contribute to the clarity of your main points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicine
  • conventional medicine
  • holistic approach
  • personalized care
  • side effects
  • regulation
  • evidence-based
  • self-care
  • empowerment
  • holistic health centers
  • complementary treatments
  • dissatisfaction
  • scientific evidence
  • appropriate treatment
  • cultural beliefs
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