It is better to buy just a few expensive clothes, rather than lots of cheaper clothes. Do you agree or disagree?
Buying the
clothes
can be a difficult decision. People have to look at their budget limit before going to
shopping. Change preposition
apply
However
, there are some individuals who thinks
that purchasing a small number of expensive Change the verb form
think
clothes
is a better decision than buying too many cheap clothes
. I strongly disagree with this
statement, and in forth-coming
Correct article usage
the forth-coming
paragraphs
I am briefly discussing both of the Add a comma
paragraphs,
point
of Change to a plural noun
points
views
.
First and foremost, some folks are more concerned about their dresses Fix the agreement mistake
view
more
than anything else. Luxury attires Correct quantifier usage
apply
grooms
their personality and make them look like of higher rank. Change the verb form
groom
However
, elite people can easily afford these clothes
. But when it comes to someone who has a very limited budget. It will be not possible for him to buy these dresses. For instance
, someone who has a low salary and living his/her life from hand to mouth. When this
kind of person buys expensive garments even if not many; it will be difficult for him to manage the other things.
On the other hand
, buying cheaper clothes
has many advantages. Person
will buy lots of Add an article
The person
A person
clothes
, also
it will be budget friendly
too. In the modern world, we have too many options when it comes to choosing garments. There are Add a hyphen
budget-friendly
lot
of cheaper options available in the market. Change the article
a lot
Moreover
, these shops and stores are offering good quality clothes
in
far Change preposition
at
less
prices. Some outlets Fix the agreement mistake
lower
also
give attractive discounts to customers. Most importantly, people have a lot of options to choose.
They can buy multiple Change preposition
from.
clothes
and change their style on daily
basis.
Correct article usage
a daily
To conclude
, both expensive and cheap clothes
have their own pros and cons. But in my opinion
person will have to consider their Add a comma
opinion,
expanses
first Correct your spelling
expenses
while
buying clothes
before anything. Because everyone have
other mandatory Change the verb form
has
expanses
as well. Correct your spelling
expenses
Therefore
, opting for the
cheaper Correct article usage
apply
clothes
are
far Correct subject-verb agreement
is
more
better than purchasing luxurious dresses.Change the word
apply
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coherence cohesion
To improve logical structure, ensure that ideas are presented in a clear, logical order. Use transition words to help guide the reader from one idea to the next. Avoid jumping from one concept to another without clear connections.
coherence cohesion
While an introduction and conclusion are present, work on refining them so they effectively frame the essay. The introduction should clearly address the essay question, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with more detailed and specific development. Use clear topic sentences for each paragraph, followed by explanations and examples that are directly related to the thesis statement.
task achievement
In terms of task achievement, ensure that the essay directly and completely addresses the question posed. Take care to fully develop your argument as required by the task, without straying off-topic.
task achievement
Your ideas are fairly clear, but to achieve a higher score, develop them more comprehensively. Expand on your points with in-depth analysis, and make sure each paragraph contributes to your overall argument.
task achievement
Include more relevant, specific examples to support your argument. These examples should be directly linked to the essay question and demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
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