In many countries crime rates among teenagers are higher than among other age groups. What are the causes of this problem and what can be done to solve it ?

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Teenagers

Use synonyms

refer to the people within the age group of 13-18.

This

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age group is

also

Linking Words

often defined as the transitional

period

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between childhood and adulthood. During

this

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period

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in which

teenagers

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encounter lots of inevitable

changes

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in their bodies and emotions, there occurs a tendency for them to rebel against their parents

Remove the comma

apply

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or any adults in power.

This

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rebellious phase leads

into

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show examples

lots of them getting involved in concerning activities, including crimes. There are several possible reasons

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apply

show examples

why

this

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phenomenon

becomes

Wrong verb form

has become

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a trend amongst youth all around the world.

Firstly

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, as mentioned previously, the teenage phase involves lots of drastic

changes

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in their bodies, emotions, and way of thinking. It is a no-brainer that these

changes

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lead

into

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show examples

confusion and fear of what's

occuring

Correct your spelling

occurring

to them.

Although

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there are few exceptions in which a kid has had a mature mindset ever since they were young, in most cases, when kids reach

this

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age of

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changes

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change

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, they feel powerful. As they are letting go of the 'child' label, they suddenly view the world as something they completely understand. They think they know what's right and what's wrong, when in fact, they don't.

This

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leads to mindless

actions

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Secondly

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, they are short-minded. During the adolescence

period

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, they suddenly gain access to

things

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that they were hindered from in the past,

such

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as privacy, social media, and so on. Side

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show examples

side with their sense of

powerfulness

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power

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, they tend to forget that all their

actions

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have consequences. Their transition

period

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lead

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leads

show examples

them to be associated with adults, but they actually do not fully comprehend the concept of responsibilities, yet.

Hence

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, they ended up prioritizing

actions

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over thinking.

Lastly

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teenagers

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are curious. Going from a child into a young adult sparks endless questions in one's mind. Curiosity is a double-edged sword.

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show examples

times, curiosity can be a good thing.

However

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, without proper guidance and a lack of sense

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show examples

consequences, it leads to irresponsible

actions

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. Most

teenagers

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validate their decisions

on trying

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to try

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out new

things

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, including criminal activities, for the sake of feeding up their curiosities. To summarize, the teenage phase involves drastic

changes

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teenager's

Fix the agreement mistake

teenagers'

show examples

bodies, emotions, and

mindset

Fix the agreement mistake

mindsets

show examples

. During

this

Linking Words

period

Use synonyms

of time, they are still unable to differentiate between the wrongs and the rights, they have not

grasp

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grasped

show examples

the concept of consequences in every

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actions

Change to a singular noun

action

show examples

yet, and they have the tendency

of feeding

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to feed

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up their

curiousity

Correct your spelling

curiosity

through mindless decisions. These

things

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lead

into

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show examples

inexcusable activities like crimes. Sure,

this

Linking Words

transitional

period

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cannot be avoided.

However

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, there are several ways that may prevent

teenagers

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from getting involved

into

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show examples

the criminal world,

such

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as providing

approriate

Correct your spelling

appropriate

guidance, maintaining good communication to know their ways of thinking better, and teaching them the correct ways of living without hindering their freedom of

choices

Fix the agreement mistake

choice

show examples

and privacies. By implementing all these

things

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, hopefully, the crime rates

amongst

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among

show examples

teenagers

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can be minimized.

writingielts0Thu Jan 11 2024

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coherence cohesion

Introduction and conclusion are present, but they need to be more impactful and focused on the essay question.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that the main body paragraphs are clearly separated and discuss individual ideas to improve the logical structure.

coherence cohesion

Support your main points with specific examples to strengthen your arguments.

task achievement

Address all parts of the task with equal development to ensure a complete response to the question.

task achievement

Present and expand on ideas to demonstrate an understanding of the topic with more depth and clarity.

task achievement

Use real-world examples or hypothetical situations to provide evidence for the causes and solutions of the problem.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

476 words

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In many countries crime rates among teenagers are higher than among other age groups. What are the causes of this problem and what can be done to solve it ?

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Nowadays the differences between countries are becoming less evident because people follow the same media. Do the advantage of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people argue that the Olympic Games have significant benefits for the host country while others believe they are a waste of money. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people argue that we should do research into their family history. Others agree with the view that we should focus on the present and future generations. Discuss both views and give your opinion.