Some argue that there is no point in spending money on wildlife protection because we humans have no need for them. I totally disagree with this view.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some argue that there is no point in spending money on
wildlife
protection because we humans have no need for them. I totally disagree with
this
view. It seems to me absurd to agree that
wildlife
has no place in the 21st century. I do not believe that the Earth exists solely for the benefit of man, and there is nothing special about
this
particular century that means we suddenly have the right to allow or encourage the extinction of any species
..
Replace the punctuation
.
...
show examples
Moreover
, there is no compelling reason why we should allow animals to die. We do not need to exploit or destroy every
last
square meter of land in order to feed or house the world's population. There is plenty of room for us to exist side by side with wild animals, and that should be our aim. I
also
disagree with the idea that protecting animals is a waste of resources. It is typically the preservation of natural habitats that ensures the survival of
wildlife
, and most scientists agree that these habitats are
also
essential for the survival of humans.​​ Rainforests,
for example
, produce oxygen, absorb carbon dioxide and stabilize the planet's climate. If we destroy these areas, the cost of managing the resulting changes to our planet will considerably exceed the cost of conservation. By protecting
wildlife
and their habitats, we maintain the natural balance of all life on Earth. In conclusion, we have no right to decide whether
wildlife
should exist or not, and I believe we should do everything we can to protect them.
Submitted by 27475868 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Your essay presents a very strong argument, keeping focused on the task. Including more varied examples or case studies could further strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try using a broader range of linking words and paragraph structuring to enhance the flow of your essay.
Introduction/Conclusion
The introduction and conclusion strongly frame your argument, effectively signaling your position and summarizing your main points.
Supported Main Points
You demonstrated a solid capability to argue your point with well-supported claims.
Clear and Comprehensive Ideas
You've made great use of comprehensive ideas and examples to argue against the notion that wildlife protection is unnecessary, showing a deep understanding of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: