Modern cultures around the world have become similar when compared to the past. What are the reasons? Is it a positive or negative development?

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The Latest cultures of various countries are becoming more similar than they used to be in the past. Yet, there remains a contentious debate as to whether the

overall

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impact of

this

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improvement can be beneficial or detrimental for various cultures.

However

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, I fully believe that

this

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is a negative development and I will support my idea with more details and practical examples.

Firstly

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, we should be going into a state where nations are protecting their own history and civilizations.

For example

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, we have seen in the news that Finland has banned the use of Coca-Cola as it influences

people

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to become more obese and it is contradictory to the Finnish culture of working hard and maintaining a healthy body.

Hence

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this

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example of aligning with the culture of the past has given rise to the better well-being of the

people

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and gives strength to my thesis.

Secondly

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, the trait of making the ideas of self past a reality of the present provides identity and paves the way to nationalism.

For instance

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, building a temple for Lord Ram in Ayodhya has made the

people

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of India proud as it makes

people

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associate their religion with their country as India is a Hindu majority-based nation without being influenced by other developed nations.

Therefore

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it is proven that building a nation as per its history will provide nationalism to its citizens

as well as

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a feeling of belongingness to the

people

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living in the country. As a way of conclusion, I once again reaffirm that

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procedure of modern cultures around the world is becoming similar

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apply

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to the past and is a negative development as its drawbacks outweigh its benefits. It is highly recommended to have and the reasons for the same can be summarised as protecting national interests, national identity and self-esteem.

Submitted by kartwgl on Fri Jan 12 2024

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task achievement

The response only touches on the task's requirement to discuss reasons for the cultural similarities and lacks a balanced discussion on whether it is a positive or negative development. The essay needs to provide stronger and more specific reasons explicitly linked to the question. Additionally, the view that it is a negative development needs to be balanced with arguments for why one might see it as positive.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure could be improved by clearly outlining points in the introduction and providing a clear topic sentence at the beginning of each paragraph. Transitions between the paragraphs could be more seamless to aid in readability and to maintain a consistent flow throughout the essay. Furthermore, the conclusion should be expanded to reiterate the main points succinctly and provide a final thought on the topic.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

301 words

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Modern cultures around the world have become similar when compared to the past. What are the reasons? Is it a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, more people are migrating to other countries than ever before. In order to become integrated into society in their adopted countries, immigrants should abandon their old ways and adapt to local customs and codes of behavior. Do you agree or disagree?

You have a problem with a recently hired employee in your workplace. Write a letter to the HR manager. In your letter: Describe the problem the new employee has caused Explain how other employees about the new employee’s conduct Say how you expect the HR manager to address the situation.

(Livia) Your manager has asked you to arrange a party for a colleague who is leaving the company. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter – Suggest a suitable date and time for the party – Recommend a venue – Propose the food and entertainment options that should be available.

Some companies and organisations require thier employees to wear uniforms. What are advantages and disadvantage of this ?

In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?