Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #aim #university #education #graduates #jobs #individuals #society

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Higher education plays a pivotal role in an individual's professional life. Many people are of the opinion that the role of

Use synonyms

university

Correct article usage

a university

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education is to merely facilitate a graduate's

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job hunting

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job-hunting

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endeavours. Others,

however

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, believe that the beneficial ramifications a

university

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can provide for its students are many.

This

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essay analyses both points of view. I believe that

besides

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helping graduates find better jobs, a

university

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can do much more. On the one hand, the

primal

Correct your spelling

primary

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objective of any

university

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is to award a successful candidate with a professional

degree

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Although

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degree

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may not guarantee a

job

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, it is

nevertheless

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necessary, as employers will not hire an individual without the right kind of academic qualifications. So a

university

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degree

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increases the

job

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prospects of individuals, and

this

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is why people are inclined to believe that

this

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is the only objective a

university

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is supposed to fulfil.

For instance

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, more than 80% of parents in South Asian countries believe that their children should have

university

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degrees for the sake of getting a better

job

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On the other hand

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, many believe that a

degree

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is just one of the many benefits a

university

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can offer. A

university

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does improve many soft

skills

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of its learners,

such

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as confidence, empathy, delegation, observation, imagination, responsibility, planning, analysis, problem-solving

skills

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and many more - the importance of which for personal, professional and social success

are

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undeniable. These days, many employers seek not only applicants' academic qualifications but

also

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important soft

skills

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. These soft

skills

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help people thrive in their personal

life

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lives

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contribute

Correct word choice

and contribute

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better to society and the nation.

Thus

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university

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education goes beyond preparing young minds for their careers. I believe that universities shape young students to become personally, socially and professionally ready to take challenges and contribute more for the betterment of all. Students learn many soft

skills

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that help them not only do better in their jobs but

also

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become better members of society and develop and grow as individuals.

To conclude

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, it is clear from the above discussion that universities emphasise developing their learners'

overall

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skills

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- including academic, professional and personal

skills

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, that are required for success in life

while

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also

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becoming better citizens

Submitted by abid.srm on Fri Jan 12 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay presents a logical structure with a clear introduction that presents the topic and indicates the writer's position. However, the development of ideas can be enhanced by creating stronger links between them. Establishing a more concise flow and using more cohesive devices would improve the cohesion of the essay. Attention to paragraph structure, including clearer topic sentences and consistent development within paragraphs, will benefit your score.

task achievement

You have responded to the task by discussing both views on university education and giving your opinion. However, while the main points are present, they could be developed more fully, with more depth and detail. Consider offering more comprehensive elaboration on each point to exhibit a clear understanding of the topic. Including a wider range of relevant, specific examples could have made the essay stronger and demonstrated a broader knowledge related to the topic. Ensure examples are pertinent and reinforce the argument effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

364 words

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Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Tests and examinations restricts teachers creativity and innovation, and they also exert unnecessary pressure on young learners. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Provide reasons for your answer. Include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

People try to change their look by changing the colour of their hair using cosmetics, wearing jewellery or even having a plastic surgery done. Why do you think people do it? Do you think changing a look is a good thing.

Some people think it's better to choose friends who always have the same opinions as them. Other people believe it's good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The following is an essay submitted by one of our students. In some countries, governments are encouraging industries and businesses to move to regional areas outside the big cities. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

News editors decide what to broadcast on television and what to print in newspapers. What factors do you think influence these decisions? Do we become used to bad news? Would it be better if more good news was reported?