In some countries, students studying in university live with their family, whereas in other countries, students choose to study in another city. Do you think the advantages of living away from homes while studying outweigh the disadvantages?

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In certain countries, college students choose to study in the local area,
while
in other countries the situation is the opposite.
Although
living far from home may influence their academic performance negatively, I believe
this
journey can teach them a lot. On the one hand, people who study far away have many choices when choosing universities.
This
helps these students advance in their careers, as they can pick the right college and major that aligns with their career path directly.
For instance
, a student who majors in medical science must possess a higher likelihood of becoming a doctor than one who holds a financial degree.
Furthermore
, the more choices mean the more opportunities in the future.
On the other hand
, these students have to handle daily activities independently, including making meals, washing clothes
as well as
tidying their rooms. As a reward, their life experience is broadened rapidly.
Moreover
, studying
further
away enhances their ability to deal with unexpected events calmly,
such
as electric shutdowns and water shutdowns. Unfortunately, people studying in another city tend to suffer from mind distribution. For some young generations, their homesick feeling is too heavy to concentrate on their courses, leading to low scores. The other ones may run out of their energy in housework.
For example
, spending 2 hours on the bus in order to purchase the necessary staff. In conclusion, the crowd who leave their family for education would get better job development and a sense of independence, as long as they manage their energy reasonably.
Submitted by yuxinyun_2023 on

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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
Address the prompt fully by discussing both advantages and disadvantages in a balanced way, and include a clear opinion or conclusion based on both sides of the argument.
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Use specific and relevant examples to bolster your points. Avoid vague statements and ensure that your examples are directly linked to the argument you are making.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • manage finances
  • daily chores
  • adult life
  • cultural exposure
  • social norms
  • networking opportunities
  • professional connections
  • personal growth
  • problem-solving skills
  • resilience
  • adaptability
  • academic focus
  • homesickness
  • mental health
  • financial burden
  • financial strain
  • safety concerns
  • unfamiliar
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