Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle.Both parents and schools are responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

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Modern society is witnessing an increasing number of children leading unhealthy lifestyles, and it is imperative to address

this

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issue promptly. I strongly agree with the statement that both

parents

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and

schools

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bear responsibility for resolving

this

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problem.

Firstly

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parents

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play a pivotal role in shaping a

child

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's habits and

lifestyle

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. The home environment significantly influences a

child

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's choices regarding diet, physical activity, and screen time.

Parents

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need to

instill

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instil

show examples

healthy habits by providing nutritious meals, encouraging outdoor activities, and setting limits on screen time. A collaborative effort between

parents

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and

schools

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is essential to reinforce consistent messages about the importance of a healthy

lifestyle

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Secondly

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schools

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serve as crucial institutions that contribute to a

child

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overall

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development. Physical education programs and extracurricular activities can promote physical fitness and

instill

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instil

show examples

a love for an active

lifestyle

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Additionally

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schools

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can educate students about the significance of a balanced diet and the potential consequences of an unhealthy

lifestyle

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. By integrating health education into the curriculum,

schools

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can empower children with the knowledge to make informed choices.

Moreover

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, collaboration between

parents

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and

schools

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is essential to create a holistic approach to address the multifaceted aspects of a

child

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's well-being. Joint initiatives,

such

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as workshops on nutrition and physical activity, can bridge the gap between home and school environments. Parent-teacher partnerships can establish a consistent framework for promoting a healthy

lifestyle

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, reinforcing positive

behaviors

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behaviours

show examples

, and addressing challenges. In conclusion, both

parents

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and

schools

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bear a shared responsibility in mitigating the prevalence of unhealthy lifestyles among children. A concerted effort, involving effective communication and collaboration between these two entities, is crucial to instill healthy habits and ensure the well-being of the younger generation.

salihzekikoniSat Jan 13 2024

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task achievement

While your essay presents a clear opinion and reasons in support of your view, you should ensure that all main points are fully developed and supported by specific examples or evidence. Try to incorporate specific examples or relevant anecdotes to illustrate your arguments, thereby adding more depth to your essay.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a good logical structure and includes an introduction and conclusion, which clearly states your position. However, the transitions between ideas could be smoother, and the coherence of the overall argument can be enhanced by more skillfully connecting related ideas and points. Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to improve the flow of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

278 words

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Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle.Both parents and schools are responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Wild animals have no use in the 21 century and trying to preserve animals now is just wastage of money. To what extent do you agree or disagree with question

To many countries, people decide to have a child at a later age. Why is this? Do the advantages of this devlopment outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The best way to reduce emissions from vehicles is to impose a higer tax on vehicles which use a lot of fuel and lower tax on those that don't. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The increasing availability of low-cost airlines now lets people travel around the world. Some feel this is a positive development while others think it is negative overall.