Some people believe that companies should be allowed to collect data about customers freely, while others believe this practice should be restricted. Discuss both sides of this issue.
Nowadayd
it is commonly claimed that firms should be able to cumulate Correct your spelling
Nowadays
information
about their clients, as it Use synonyms
simplify
Change the verb form
simplifies
customer
service. Use synonyms
However
, some argue that Linking Words
this
should be forbidden, because it may endanger a Linking Words
client
's personal Use synonyms
data
.
On the Use synonyms
one
hand, only by collecting Use synonyms
information
about a Use synonyms
customer
can a company make their services easier. Use synonyms
Firstly
, were a firm to save Linking Words
data
from a first collaboration with a person, next time the Use synonyms
information
processing part wouldn't be necessary. Use synonyms
This
undoubtedly would make Linking Words
a
cooperation simpler for both a corporation and a user. Remove the article
apply
Also
, saved Linking Words
information
might be Use synonyms
subsequently
used in terms of choosing a specific product that a certain Linking Words
client
is usually interested in. Use synonyms
For example
, H&M, Linking Words
one
of the most popular Use synonyms
clouthing
Correct your spelling
clothing
shop
in the world, collects Fix the agreement mistake
shops
a
Correct article usage
apply
data
regarding Use synonyms
a
size of clothes often Correct article usage
the
prefered
by a Correct your spelling
preferred
customer
, so that it Use synonyms
suggest
Change the verb form
suggests
this
category during Linking Words
a
following shopping.
Correct article usage
the
However
, some argue that despite these positive aspects, Linking Words
possesion
of Correct your spelling
possession
one
's private Use synonyms
data
may endanger it. Use synonyms
In other words
, Linking Words
usually
firms use Add a comma
usually,
this
Linking Words
information
for their marketing research, not Use synonyms
necessarly
for the good of their Correct your spelling
necessarily
necessary
client
. Use synonyms
For
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
reason
they often share Add a comma
reason,
this
Linking Words
data
with other companies or people working for them. The evidence for Use synonyms
this
was provided in a recent survey published by the US National Linking Words
Customer
Service Organization which indicates that hardly Use synonyms
never
the Correct your spelling
ever
data
regarding a Use synonyms
Use synonyms
client's
Change noun form
client
does
Unnecessary verb
apply
reamin
among a single company. Under Correct your spelling
remain
thes
circumstances, personal Correct your spelling
these
information
about an individual might be in time used by someone who Use synonyms
initially
has no right to have it.
Linking Words
To conclude
, the debate about whether companies should be permitted to Linking Words
posses
Correct your spelling
possess
data
regarding their clients is complex and multifaced. Use synonyms
Although
it can make a positive contribution to the quality of Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
customer
service, it undoubtedly Use synonyms
put
Wrong verb form
puts
one
's personal Use synonyms
infomration
at risk.Correct your spelling
information
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear structure, with distinct paragraphs for the introduction, main body, and conclusion. Link ideas and paragraphs together using cohesive devices effectively.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they are not equally strong. The conclusion needs to summarise the points made clearer.
coherence cohesion
Develop main points thoroughly with specific and relevant examples to enhance the argument and provide a more persuasive essay.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task. Ensure you discuss both views and give your own opinion if the question requires it, which would enrich the response.
task achievement
Express your ideas clearly and expand on them comprehensively to demonstrate a complete understanding of the topic.
task achievement
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Your opinion
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