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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below gives information on the aveneye cost of a monthly plan from four defferent mabile phone providers in a European Country. Between January and September 2012, measured in erous.

The chart below gives information on the aveneye cost of a monthly plan from four defferent mabile phone providers in a European Country. Between January and September 2012, measured in erous.
The graph
dowm
Correct your spelling
below
 demonstrates facts on the range price pf munthly programm from 4 different
smart phone
Correct your spelling
smartphone
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 suppliers in a European country. snice January until september2012, measured in
euros
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, The range price of Alpha Supplier increased significantly.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
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 there was a normal increase in costs of Demo and Lex.
While
Linking Words
 the fourth one the Sim Tx gives a decline statue. Alpha giver started the period with only 5
euros
Use synonyms
 and continued with
price
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the price
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 until the June with only a slight rising between them, and begin increase gradually in the next month and kept like
this
Linking Words
 to be
finaly
Correct your spelling
finally
in
Change the preposition
at
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 the end of
period
Add an article
the period
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 with average 25
euros
Use synonyms
.Unlike that, Sim Tx
begin
Wrong verb form
began
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period
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the period
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 with almost 9 and continued in
steady
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a steady
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 way to
reached
Wrong verb form
reach
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 nearly 15
euros
Use synonyms
 in
median
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the median
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 , following that a
dramaticaly
Correct your spelling
dramatically
reducing
Replace the word
reduction
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 to
finished
Replace the word
finish
show examples
 with
median
Add an article
a median
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 down the 10
euros
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the rest two where steady and similar results with
with
Remove the redundancy
apply
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a slights differences , Lex appear with almost 12
euros
Use synonyms
 and Kept on it with
steady
Add an article
the steady
a steady
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move
Fix the agreement mistake
moves
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 and small
up down
Add a hyphen
up-down
show examples
 changes until
Add an article
the finish
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finish
Wrong verb form
finished
show examples
 with over 16
euros
Use synonyms
 in
median
Add an article
the median
show examples
 ,
while
Linking Words
 Demo showed up
by
Change preposition
at
show examples
 15 and get increased in dramatically way to reach 20 in May and
keot
Correct your spelling
kept
 like
this
Linking Words
 up to 2 months and increased again to be 25 in July but
this
Linking Words
 changed
immediatly
Correct your spelling
immediately
 to get dropped in slight amount .

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words euros with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "gives" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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