IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many people lose their income due to CoVid19 pandemic. What solution that can do by government or individual to overcome this problem.

#people #income #covid #pandemic #government
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It is a great issue that a group of individuals has been facing stiff challenges because of
COVID-19
Correct article usage
the COVID-19
show examples
pandemic
Use synonyms
 across the globe.
This
Linking Words
pandemic
Use synonyms
 not only affects human health but
also
Linking Words
 decreases the
level
Use synonyms
 of earnings at an alarming rate. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss some measures which will be taken either by the
government
Use synonyms
 or
person
Use synonyms
 to address
this
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 issue. In the very first place, COVID-19 was one of the greatest events that was considered as the
pandemic
Use synonyms
 declared by the WHO (World Health Organization) in the inception of 2022. Millions of
people
Use synonyms
 have been infected by
this
Linking Words
 disease across the world as
this
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 was being transmitted from one
person
Use synonyms
 to another
person
Use synonyms
 by coughing and running nose.
In addition
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 to
this
Linking Words
, many
people
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 lost their loved
person
Use synonyms
 because of
this
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 disease.
This
Linking Words
pandemic
Use synonyms
 not only creates human disasters but
also
Linking Words
 causes
people
Use synonyms
 to be jobless as worldwide businesses have been shrinking
due to
Linking Words
 less demand for essential commodities. There are a variety of effective solutions by the municipalities to tackle
this
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 issue. The
government
Use synonyms
 can take the initiative to set up industries which will help to create employment opportunities locally and globally.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
government
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 may provide small loans at
low interest
Add a hyphen
low-interest
show examples
 rates so that youth are encouraged to be entrepreneurs.
For instance
Linking Words
, if a
person
Use synonyms
 starts a business with
government
Use synonyms
 support,
then
Linking Words
 a lot of job opportunities will be created in the country that will have a positive impact on increasing the
overall
Linking Words
income
Use synonyms
 of the country's
people
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
foreign direct investment might be another step toward the
high
Add a hyphen
high-income
show examples
income
Use synonyms
level
Use synonyms
 of the
people
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the
government
Use synonyms
 can maintain a good liaison with neighbouring countries to attract foreign direct investment. The
income
Use synonyms
level
Use synonyms
 can be increased by taking the initiative at the individual
level
Use synonyms
. One significant measure can be initiating a start-up business in
this
Linking Words
 modern world. There are several types of online-based businesses that can be started by the young generation
such
Linking Words
 as digital marketing, and freelancing.
This
Linking Words
 type of technological initiative will help to increase the
income
Use synonyms
level
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, though the COVID-19
pandemic
Use synonyms
 is considered as reducing
people
Use synonyms
's earnings, it is easily addressed by the
government
Use synonyms
 and individual
level
Use synonyms
 by taking some landmark initiatives to create employment opportunities
as well as
Linking Words
 technology-based businesses.
Submitted by faisalmahamood on

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task achievement
Ensure that the essay directly addresses all parts of the task with well-developed responses, showing a clear position throughout the text.
task achievement
Include a wider range of concrete examples and data to substantiate claims, which adds strength and persuasiveness to the argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on achieving a smoother progression of ideas with better usage of cohesive devices to enhance the flow of paragraphs and overall text structure.
coherence cohesion
Ensure paragraphing is managed correctly with clear and consistent themes in each paragraph supported by relevant examples and explanations. Main points should be cohesive and easily identifiable.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial aid
  • Unemployment benefits
  • Job creation
  • Essential services
  • Small businesses
  • Tax relief
  • Retraining
  • Upskilling
  • Remote work
  • Digital infrastructure
  • Mental health
  • Stress management
  • Community support
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Self-employed
  • Pandemic
  • Income loss
  • Workforce
  • Subsidies
  • Telecommuting
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