Today more countries import food from different parts of the world. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.

The change of selling
products
which are imported from other countries
instead
of local sources in
supermarkets
is a topic which bears some consideration.
This
writer argues that the benefits of the quality and the high income outweigh the drawbacks of job loss seen
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
local
farmers
. The most advantageous factor for importing
foods
is that it allows buyers to enhance their health.
In other words
, most imported
foods
are usually planted and taken care of with modern technology in developed nations and
farmers
tend to avoid using pesticides on their
products
.
Thus
,
people
around the world purchase more imported
foods
than local ones in order to protect themselves
as well as
their families from pesticides and chemical substances.
As a result
,
supermarkets
sell more imported
foods
to meet the needs of customers. The high income of
supermarkets
should
also
be considered. It must recognised that imported
foods
usually have attractive packaging and various choices for
people
to buy.
Furthermore
, imported
foods
also
have the same price as local ones but they gain more nutritious and dean ingredients.
Therefore
, buyers will be attracted by imported
products
and
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
a lot of money on them.
As a result
, it will make an increase in supermarket revenue and more and more local
supermarkets
will invest in imported food from other countries.
However
, some
people
think that the large amount of imported food will make
farmers
lose jobs.
This
is
due to
the fact that when
people
go shopping, they tend to spend money on imported
foods
and ignore local ones.
This
may be true but by cooperating and learning farming techniques from developed countries, local
farmers
will go a long way in advancing local
products
and regaining buyer's interest.
Therefore
, the loss of job opportunities is outweighed by the benefits of high-quality
products
and high revenue for
supermarkets
.
Hence
, importing
foods
from nations all around the world is more beneficial for
supermarkets
.
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coherence cohesion
The essay presents a basic structure, with an introduction, body, and conclusion. However, the organization of ideas could be improved to ensure a clearer progression of arguments. To enhance the logical structure, you should make sure that each paragraph has a distinct main idea that is developed and connected to the overall argument of the essay. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to show the relationships between the parts of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present but could be more effectively developed to establish and summarise your main points. The introduction should explicitly present the issue and your thesis statement, and the conclusion should restate your position and summarise the main arguments without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
It is good that you have provided support for your main points; however, to achieve a higher band score, expand on your supporting details to fully develop your arguments. Use more specific examples and information, and include a balance of both advantages and disadvantages to meet the requirements of the prompt.
task achievement
You have addressed the task to some extent and attempted to present both sides of the argument, but the response could be more complete. Ensure that you discuss both advantages and disadvantages equally to fully address the prompt. Aim for a balanced discussion that covers all parts of the question thoroughly.
task achievement
While you have communicated some clear ideas, take care to further elaborate on these ideas to provide a more comprehensive response. Adding more specific examples and explanations will showcase your ability to discuss complex subjects in detail.
task achievement
To achieve a higher level of task achievement, incorporate more varied and detailed examples. Specific examples are effective in illustrating your points and demonstrating a wider range of knowledge on the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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