IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The bar chart below shows the average rainfall for Australia by month for last year. The line shows the average rainfall for Australia by month for the last 40 years.

The bar chart below shows the average rainfall for Australia by month for last year. The line shows the average rainfall for Australia by month for the last 40 years.
#bar #rainfall #australia #month #year #line #years
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The given bar
chart
Use synonyms
 illustrates the typical
rainfall
Use synonyms
 during the
last
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
 per month and the line
chart
Use synonyms
 provides information on a 40-
year
Use synonyms
trend
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 of the
rainfall
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 in those months. Looking at the
overall
Linking Words
 perspective, it is apparent that the
rainfall
Use synonyms
 for the first month reached a peak
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
in Aug and Sep dropped to a low. In terms of
trend
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, the rain volume decreased sharply from its peak in Jan to Apr and May and
then
Linking Words
 went down slightly to its low in Aug and Sep, before rising over
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 three months of the
year
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.
According to
Linking Words
 the bar
chart
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, Jan accounted for the highest amount of
rainfall
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 at 70
mm
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, followed by Feb and Mar at just below 60
mm
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 and 60
mm
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 respectively. Except for May when its rain volume (40
mm
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)
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
last
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
 outnumbered the general
trend
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 valued at 30
mm
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, and neither of the months from Apr to Oct experienced a value higher than 30
mm
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.
Also
Linking Words
, the figures indicate that the
rainfall
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 went up sharply from 10
mm
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 in Sep to 60mm in the
last
Linking Words
 month. In terms of compatibility of the bar
chart
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 and line
chart
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, the general
trend
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 can be seen in the
last
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
 except for Mar, May and June.
Submitted by hamidreza.rezaei21 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, rainfall, year, trend, mm with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "went down" was used 2 times.
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