These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

Currently, fathers are taking care of their children in their houses
instead
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of going to work.
Moreover
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, the number of mothers going to work has recently increased. I will name the reasons for
this
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and my opinion on whether it is a positive or negative development. A decade ago, mothers used to stay at home
while
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husbands went to their jobs, and that recent change is a result of a number of reasons. Mainly, there has always been a stigma around stay-at-home fathers and social values that obligate mothers to stay at home.
Besides
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, the desire for husbands to build stronger bonds with children by spending more time with them provoked the advancement in society.
For example
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, my uncle started teleworking
last
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year because he had not spent enough time with his little kids and felt like he missed them. Personally, I think it is a positive evolution. It is really important for kids who can benefit from the involvement of teaching skills from both parents .
For instance
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, I watched a film where a teenager had lost his father , and he did not have physical skills at all. I
also
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think it is positive because it gives opportunities to women who want to shine in the working world.
Furthermore
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, there are famous women who are well known for their achievements , like Marie Curie or Frida Kahlo.
To conclude
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, there has been an exchange lately between genders about going to work and staying home. It is
due to
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the change in social values
as well as
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to the desire of fathers to be with their families. I think it has principally positive aspects,
such
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as the benefits for the youngsters or its practicality.

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task
Your essay has a clear view, but add more balance. Include more reasons for and against, and give simple, real examples.
coherence
Link ideas smoothly. Use simple connectors like 'also', 'and', 'but', 'for example' to show how ideas go together.
lexical
Use plain words. Some phrases are hard or long. Try easy phrases like 'parents' role in care' instead of long phrases.
grammar
Check grammar. Watch verb form and punctuation. Keep sentences short and clear.
stance
You state your view clearly and give a few good examples.
structure
There is a basic structure with an introduction, body and conclusion.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • breadwinner
  • caregiving
  • paternal leave
  • societal perceptions
  • gender roles
  • flexible working conditions
  • personal preference
  • father-child relationship
  • emotional and social development
  • household responsibilities
  • career opportunities
  • professional achievements
  • balanced parenting
  • earning potential
  • social stigma
  • societal pressure
  • discrimination
  • traditional mindsets
  • resentment
  • adjustment
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