As technology develops, more shopping and business is done through the internet while communication face to face becomes less frequent. Is this a positive or a negative development?
As we can see, from time to time, there is a tremendous upgrade in almost every department worldwide. Technology has been filling in, helping and even replacing the work of the conventional force labourers. I am in two minds about
this
issue since it has both positive and negative effects . On one side, it brings convenience and simplifies our efforts in purchasing and doing business. On the other hand
, it will reduce face-to-face communication.
The plus side is that from the customers' point of view, as we are all, our daily routines in grocery and buying goods are even dominated by technology. The economy is pretty much affected by applications, websites, or blogs. These will facilitate buyers to buy only by clicking on the internet.
Nowadays, we can easily have a home-based business to increase our salary. Considering the upcoming inflation, Millennials and Gen Z may feel that putting their income into savings or just finding a work-life balance is an uphill battle. Hence
, e-commerce can be the best solution for them as a side hustle.
On the contrary
, in developing countries, sadly, the old way of transaction is the only way to make a living for most of the poor shopkeepers. Therefore
, the developing tools will add more gap between the rich and the unfortunate. Often, merchants do not have the privilege of a smartphone, the internet, or the knowledge to use it.
Take my country as an example, in Indonesia, not long ago there were some protests against the TikTok Shops due to
the cheap prices they offered from the applications. Sellers on TikTok Shops may rise while
the sellers in Pasar Tanah Abang face their worst nightmare, bankruptcy. There were no visitors, even if there were, they did not buy from them.
To conclude
, I am on the fence about the improvement of machinery in the shopping and trade area. With the easiness it offers, it may hurt the underprivileged if the government does not pay their concern to the small people. One way or another, I think we should find a solution to bridge this
gap so that this
advancement brings benefit to everyone regardless of their economic status.Submitted by aghnia.ulhaq on
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task achievement
Ensure that your essay has a clear position throughout the response, rather than appearing undecided ('on the fence'). The task requires you to discuss whether the development is positive or negative and to what extent. An examiner needs to understand your viewpoint clearly.
coherence cohesion
Be sure that your paragraphs are well-organized and logically structured. Each body paragraph should present one main idea and follow it with supporting examples or explanations. The transition between your ideas should be smooth, thus guiding the reader effortlessly through your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to link your ideas more effectively. While some are used appropriately, varying your language can demonstrate a higher degree of linguistic skill and can improve the flow of your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.