IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free times. This can benefit teenagers and benefit the community as well. To what extend do you agree or disagree,

Certain individuals argue that allowing
teenagers
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 to participate in free
community
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 work can benefit both the
community
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 and the
teenagers
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. I completely agree with
this
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 idea because
teenagers
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 can learn the importance of social responsibility
while
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also
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 positively impacting the
community
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.
Teenagers
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 are the future of society, and they must develop a keen sense of social responsibility and awareness. By devoting their
time
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 and effort to addressing the needs of the local
community
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, students can develop a profound understanding of the benefits of working together to grow their
community
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,
thus
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 inculcating a sense of responsible citizenship and an understanding that helping out doesn't always come with a cash reward.
For instance
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, a teenager working in a food bank after school will see how the underprivileged benefit from his help, and
this
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 can teach him
fulfillment
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fulfilment
show examples
.
Furthermore
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, the
community
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 will positively benefit from the free help and from keeping the
teenagers
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 busy.
Firstly
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, the
community
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 gets to save money, diverting the funds set aside for paying staff to other important sectors because of the
teenagers
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 who have volunteered.
Secondly
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, an idle mind can be a devil's workshop shop and giving
teenagers
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 too much free
time
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 can lead to them becoming a nuisance in the
community
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. So
instead
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 of
teenagers
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 hanging around aimlessly during their free
time
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, they will be contributing to the growth of the
community
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. In conclusion, I agree that
teenagers
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 should use that free
time
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 to work for the
community
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 because it teaches them the importance of social responsibility
while
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 promoting the growth of the
community
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.

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structure
Keep a clear view in every paragraph. Start with a topic sentence that states the main idea.
evidence
Provide one or two extra examples to support each point.
vocabulary
Use simple and precise words. Avoid long or awkward phrases.
coherence
Explain why the example matters to the main idea to increase impact.
task response
If you mention a point, also mention a counterpoint and why your view still wins.
grammar
Check grammar and spelling to avoid small mistakes that slow reading.
content
The writer takes a clear stance and agrees with the idea.
structure
There are linking words that help the flow of ideas.
evidence
An example is given to show impact on people.
form
A conclusion that restates the main view is present.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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