The crime rates now-a-days is decreasing compared to the past due to advance technology which can prevent and solve crime. Do you agree or disagree?
These days the development of crime technologies has a good impact on lowering the crime rate. The existence of these technologies helps law enforcement officers to deter criminal activities and do forensic science.
On the other hand
, technological advances also
help criminals to commit cyber-attacks or other technology-based crimes. I believe that machinery has two sides of the face that will impact case handling.
On one hand, many countries establish information systems to process crime data to produce atrocity activities information, so it will make criminals getting caught easier. For example
, all communication info from drug dealers is stored and processed to be drug circulation maps, so police get information about the owner and the buyer. When it comes to the advantages of using technology in violation, we can say that there are robots that also
allow officers to analyze DNA from victims, evidence, or case scenes increasing the risk of criminals getting caught. This
proves that the advancement of technology will increase the level of violation eradication.
Despite the fact that high tech will help catch suspects, technological advancement also
allows gangsters to advance violation cases. For instance
, there are organizations which do cyber-attacks on other companies to steal their personal info and ask for a ransom to ensure statistics security. This
will not happen if the computer programming not making progress.
To sum up
, I believe that always there is positive and negative about the improvement of something. It depends on the purpose of the machinery used.Submitted by dewintaputri23 on
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt but lacks depth in analysis. To improve, ensure that your points are expanded thoroughly, explaining how technology impacts crime rates and providing specific, detailed examples. Develop your main ideas further for a more complete response.
coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a basic structure but can benefit from clearer transitions and more cohesive devices. Work on improving the flow between ideas and ensuring that each paragraph is clearly connected to the central topic. Use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph and summarise your main points more effectively in the conclusion.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite