Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Rapid technology has allowed many new inventions to be produced with no exception of
health
industry Add an article
the health
that
there is an increasing trend where society Correct word choice
apply
choose
to visit Correct subject-verb agreement
chooses
alternatives option
over professional doctors as it is far cheaper in some cases. Fix the agreement mistake
alternative options
However
, in my view, this
can be perceived as a negative trend due to
the two reasons that i
will explain in Change the capitalization
I
th
following paragraphs.
Correct your spelling
the
Firstly
, going to an alternative treatments
option can lead to malpractice. Change the noun form
treatment
This
is because many of the alternatives practitioner
did not attend any formal education nor have a requisite knowledge about anything Fix the agreement mistake
alternative practitioners
that is
related to medical science whereas
doctors need to follow a long journey to finally
become a specalist
. Take a look at Indonesia, where Correct your spelling
specialist
alternatives
are dominantly occupied by religious individuals who offers
spiritual experience of Correct subject-verb agreement
offer
treatement
. Correct your spelling
treatment
Hence
, trusting alternatives
that claim can cure many kind
of illnesses sounds extremely irrelevant in Change to a plural noun
kinds
which
there is likely a chance for the result to Correct pronoun usage
apply
come
worse, especially when curing patients with special and rare cases Verb problem
become
such
as cancer.
Secondly
, account for the side effects given from
the incorrect measurements of Change preposition
by
drugs
from informal institutions. Usually, alternatives
practitioners Change the noun form
alternative
offers
one-for-all medicines without customizing each of the Change the verb form
offer
patiens
needs. Correct your spelling
patients
patient
Moreover
, the drugs
that
is
used Change the verb form
are
also
mostly containing of
herbs with questionably proven certification. Wrong verb form
contain
Hence
, without a
careful guidance by professionals may cause to Remove the article
apply
complecatioin
of overusing Correct your spelling
completion
drugs
.
To conclude
, considering how complex any worst cases may occur from death threats to drugs
overconsumption, which Change the noun form
drug
caused
by untrustworthy institutions seems to make Add a missing verb
is caused
this
trend as
a negative development. Change preposition
apply
Hence
, people need to think wisely that nothing more
Add a missing verb
is more
imporant
than the worth of healthiness before visiting Correct your spelling
important
alternatives
.Submitted by pink panther on
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task achievement
Ensure that you address the prompt fully by discussing both sides of the argument or by providing a complex and thorough explanation for your one-sided stance.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices and transition words to improve the flow and connections between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Work on paragraph structure. Each paragraph should contain one main idea that is developed and elaborated on.
task achievement
Support your arguments with more detailed and specific examples to strengthen your position and make it more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Consider rephrasing sentences that are awkward or unclear to improve readability and avoid misinterpretation.
coherence cohesion
Check for and correct grammatical errors and typos to enhance the overall clarity and professionalism of the essay.