It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words

Old
people
often remind young
people
to think twice before doing anything. Of course, what the old
people
say is not unreasonable, but for young
people
, taking
risks
often means
opportunities
. Taking
risks
represents daring to try and explore the unknown, which brings all kinds of uncertainties to our professional lives and personal lives.
However
, whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages depends on how we face
risks
and how well we control and prepare for them. First of all, in terms of professional
life
, taking
risks
means having the courage to challenge existing methods and ideas, and having the courage to explore and try new areas and
opportunities
. In
this
way, taking
risks
may allow us to discover new business
opportunities
and market needs. Only by doing what no one else dares to do and what others would not think of can you seize the opportunity.
This
kind of adventurous spirit can often bring unexpected success and even lead to a leading position.
Secondly
, in terms of personal
life
, taking
risks
allows us to step out of our comfort zone and have new experiences, thereby broadening our horizons and enriching our experience. Taking
risks
can
also
improve personal confidence, courage and adaptability, allowing us to better adapt to changes and face difficulties.
However
, taking
risks
also
comes with uncertainty and risk. At work, taking
risks
may result in financial losses and may even have a negative impact on the party. Especially taking
risks
in
life
requires more caution. Sometimes failure may only lead to disappointment and frustration, but in certain
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
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situation
Add a comma
situation,
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it may endanger personal safety.
Therefore
, when taking
risks
we need to have adequate preparation, planning and cautions to reduce potential
risks
and negative impacts. In conclusion, I do think the advantages of taking
risks
outweigh the disadvantages, Taking
risks
is necessary both in professional
life
and personal
life
. It can bring us new
opportunities
and expand our experiences only if we remain rational and cautious when
talking
Correct your spelling
taking
show examples
risks
.
Submitted by fiasngs on

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coherence cohesion
The essay comprises an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, ensuring that the basic structure of the task is met. However, the logical flow between ideas could be further improved by better linking words or phrases. This will enhance the clarity of argument progression and the overall coherence of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Try to include a wider range of cohesive devices (such as 'furthermore,' 'on the other hand,' 'as a result,' etc.), along with a more complex structure of sentences to create smooth transitions between ideas and paragraphs.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the task by discussing both sides of the argument regarding taking risks. To improve task achievement, develop your points further with more detailed and specific examples from real life or hypothetical scenarios to effectively support your argument. This will not only enrich your essay but also show your ability to think critically about the topic.
task achievement
You successfully conveyed your opinion that the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages. To improve, reflect more on the counterargument to create a more balanced discussion before concluding definitively in your favour. This would demonstrate your ability to consider and evaluate both sides of an argument, which is a crucial aspect of task achievement.
task achievement
In future essays, try to directly address the essay question in the introduction and reiterate your position in the conclusion for greater impact. Ensure to give equal weight to discussing both the advantages and disadvantages to fully satisfy the task requirements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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