You have heard that there is a part-time job available in a nearby shop. Write a letter to the shop's manager, applying for the job. specify what job you are applying for write about your experience and skills and why you should get an interview ask about the hours required for the job and give your preferred hours You should write at least 150 words.

#job #shop #manager #skills #interview #hours

Dear sir, I am writing

this

letter with regard to applying for a cashier position at your retail store.

To begin

with, my name is Parth Parmar and I am an international student in Canada, who is actively looking for employment.

Furthermore

, I have experience

Change preposition

apply

show examples

working as a cashier boy in my home country,

apart from

this

I did two weeks of a replacement job on behalf of my friend, so I am aware of the general guidelines about

this

occupation.

Lastly

,I don't have only work-related experience but

also

have some soft skills,

such

as communication and problem-solving skills, which make my chances more suitable for the position of cashier.

In addition

, I would like to inquire about the availability you require for

this

job .

However

, I am ready to work from Monday to Thursday at any time because luckily I have classes on weekends. I look forward to hearing your response. Yours sincerely Parthkumar Parmar

Submitted by pp6859 on Thu May 09 2024

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Task Achievement

To enhance your task response, be more specific about your skills and experience. Mention what specifically makes you a strong candidate for the cashier position.

Coherence & Cohesion

Consider using a variety of sentence structures and transition words to improve flow and coherence.

Task Achievement

To clarify the hours of availability, consider rephrasing to directly state your preferred working hours instead of indicating your class schedule.

Coherence & Cohesion

Well-structured letter, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.

Task Achievement

Appropriate tone for a formal letter, polite and to the point.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

158 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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With access to the internet and social media websites, many children are exposed to a number of dangerous situations. Adults should thus limit access to the internet for their children. Do you agree or disagree?

advantages and disadvantages of playing video games in children.

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