IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart shows the average daily minimum and maximum levels of air pollutants in 4 cities 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The chart shows the average daily minimum and maximum levels of air pollutants in 4 cities 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#levels #air #pollutants #cities #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar chart illustrates the comparison of pollutant
Use synonyms
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
 that contaminate four different countries namely
Los
Use synonyms
Angeles
Use synonyms
, Calcutta, Beijing and
Mexico
Use synonyms
City
Use synonyms
 on daily averages. In general,
Mexico
Use synonyms
City
Use synonyms
 experiences the highest
level
Use synonyms
 of pollutants of N20 and SO2 on a day, Beijing has the lowest
level
Use synonyms
 of
Min
Use synonyms
 N20,
while
Linking Words
Los
Use synonyms
Angeles
Use synonyms
 has the lowest
level
Use synonyms
 of pollutants of So2. To commend with the
level
Use synonyms
 of N20.
Mexico
Use synonyms
City
Use synonyms
 witnessed on
level
Use synonyms
 207
max
Use synonyms
 N20
while
Linking Words
level
Use synonyms
 of minimum N20 in
level
Use synonyms
 113.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
Los
Use synonyms
Angeles
Use synonyms
 is the second
city
Use synonyms
 which has 104
levels
Use synonyms
 of
Max
Use synonyms
 N20 and 39
levels
Use synonyms
 of
Min
Use synonyms
 N20. Beijing and Calcutta experience the same condition in terms of
Max
Use synonyms
 N20, in over 50
levels
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 their
min
Use synonyms
level
Use synonyms
 of N20 saw a different
level
Use synonyms
, the previous one in 14
levels
Use synonyms
 and the latter in 30
levels
Use synonyms
. in terms of SO2,
Mexico
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
city
Capitalize word
City
show examples
 is seen at 200 at the
max
Use synonyms
level
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 hitting 80 at the
min
Use synonyms
level
Use synonyms
. Beijing has half of
Mexico
Use synonyms
City
Use synonyms
 in the
Use synonyms
max
Correct word choice
maximum
show examples
level
Use synonyms
 of SO2 and has 25
levels
Use synonyms
 in the minimum. Calcutta's
level
Use synonyms
 of Maximum and minimum of SO2 are quite the same, only has 12 different points,
while
Linking Words
Los
Use synonyms
Angeles
Use synonyms
 has the lowest
level
Use synonyms
 on both,
Max
Use synonyms
 hit 10 and
min
Use synonyms
 in 2
levels
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words level, los, angeles, mexico, city, n, min, max, levels with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: