Some people argue that it is not wise for an industry to replace its experienced but old workers with new and young yet inexperienced individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some believe replacing elderly individuals at the age of retirement with the young generation is not an intelligent approach for companies. To contrary
this
belief, I think change is an inevitable factor and
this
will happen sooner rather than later, so to minimize the consequences and have the best advantage of
this
action, companies should look into some answers
such
as training a suitable succession. One of the best solutions for reducing the effect of losing aged employees is training a suitable replacement. Before the old workers reach retirement age, the human resource unit of every company should train the inexperienced staff with the help of senior ones to gain some essential knowledge.
For instance
, the new ones could learn how to behave in a certain situation or learn some fundamental basics about critical thinking in a time of crisis which results in decreasing the downside of letting the skillful people go.
Furthermore
, taking risks among young adults is significantly more excessive than older ones. taking more chances by employees can bring innovation and dynamics to the mix in the working environment. Old people are usually creatures of habit and are more resistant to changes and prefer to perform in certain ways,
however
, the newly arrived recruits with open minds are more ready to make an effort and attempt things in alternative procedures even without knowing the outcomes, so taking risks can lead to having a more dynamic and thriving company. In conclusion, there are some biased judgments regarding
this
topic, but from my point of view, since change is the law of nature and it applies to everyone including humans replacing expert staff with new inexperienced individuals could be rewarding if it occurs with precise and realistic schemes
such
as training a suitable succession.
Submitted by mh.emrani on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs is clear. Use transition words and phrases to help the reader follow the argument.
coherence cohesion
Incorporate an introduction and conclusion that clearly state your viewpoint and summarize your main points, respectively. While present, these could be strengthened for better clarity.
coherence cohesion
Develop main points fully by providing specific examples and explanations. While you have provided some examples, elaborating on these with more detail and analysis will strengthen the argument.
task achievement
Cover all parts of the task by providing a balanced view or exploring different perspectives, especially if the question explicitly asks for this. Your essay should reflect a full engagement with the topic.
task achievement
Express ideas clearly and comprehensively by laying out your argument in a well-structured manner, making sure that each paragraph contains one clear main idea and is related back to the thesis statement.
task achievement
Use relevant examples to support points made, ensuring they are specific and directly related to the topic at hand. Strive to integrate them seamlessly into your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • experienced
  • old workers
  • young
  • inexperienced
  • replace
  • industry
  • wise
  • argue
  • valuable
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • loss of expertise
  • lack
  • necessary
  • experience
  • maturity
  • diverse
  • workforce
  • mix
  • age groups
  • beneficial
  • focus
  • providing opportunities
  • continuous learning
  • development
  • balanced approach
  • smooth transition
  • maintain productivity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: