Topic: Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people. Task: what are the advantages and disadvantages of children playing computer games?

As the incorporation of technology and entertainment is beginning to advance, children and adolescents are spending a questionable amount of hours playing computer games.

For

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this

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reason, numerous health professionals have expressed their concerns about the impacts it may have.

This

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essay will assess the benefits and drawbacks of gaming on younger people

as well as

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delve into how it can possibly enrich children's skills and temper with their perspective of the world at once. Playing can be considered a part of a learning process

that is

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advantageous and necessary for a child's brain development.

Moreover

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, it can enhance one's competency in critical thinking and problem-solving. In fact, many computer-based entertainment are designed to offer players intriguing experiences that can only be materialised in games.

Therefore

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, it has a crucial role in helping young people's mental growth so that they are able to tackle realistic obstacles in life later on. Despite these advantages, there is evidence that overdoing

this

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activity can yield undesirable results,

such

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as failure in time management and abandonment of priorities.

Furthermore

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, some gamers are beginning to show signs of being too attached to their gaming devices, including computers. As a matter of fact, a lot of them refuse to ascertain their actual responsibilities and choose to utterly abandon them

instead

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. Undeniably, gaming can eventually contribute to the downfall of young people's futures in the long run.

To sum up

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, gaming can be a useful and recreational activity for the players' self-improvement, yet may

also

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harm their sense of time and priority. That being said, it is a double-ended sword, which has both its upsides and downsides.

Nonetheless

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, to reduce

further

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risk, I suggest a collaboration between the government and parents to decide to what extent can games provide entertainment and education for today's young generation.

writingielts0

Jan 20, 2024

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Task Achievement

Make sure to discuss both advantages and disadvantages equally. Focus on expanding your supporting arguments with specific examples for both sides to strengthen your points.

Coherence & Cohesion

Improve your essay by adding more transitional phrases and signposting language to guide the reader through your argument more clearly.

Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure that your introduction and conclusion encapsulate the main points of your argument effectively. You may consider restating the key advantages and disadvantages in your conclusion for greater impact.

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

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Topic: Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people. Task: what are the advantages and disadvantages of children playing computer games?

A friend has agreed to look after your house and pet while you are on holiday. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: give contact details for when you are away, give instructions about how to care for your pet, describe other household duties you would like your friend to undertake.

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Many offenders commit more crimes after serving their first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed while others believe actions can be taken to bring about a change. Discuss both views and give your opinion