Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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The decreasing amount of time that

children

Use synonyms

spend on offline activities is dangerously alarming,

hence

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why many

juveniles

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are so occupied with smartphones to compensate for that.

This

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phenomenon is allegedly caused by a major expansion of advancement of technology which allows

children

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to do most of their activity via online platforms, even for studying, and increasing the sense of dependency.

This

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essay will discuss how

this

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particular shift of behaviour is not beneficial for the offspring.

Firstly

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children

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may lack self-control and refuse to put their phones down to do their responsibilities,

such

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as studying or engaging with family members. Take video games,

for instance

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this

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particular activity is so addictive that it severely causes plummeting school grades for many adolescents. If

this

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issue is not quickly tackled, it will lead to more severe damage,

such

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as a lack of cognitive development and self-regulation of the

juveniles

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Thus

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, the overuse of smartphones impacts the emotional intelligence of their users, especially their offspring.

Secondly

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, other than impacting the social well-being of

children

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, the skyrocketing number of screen time

also

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affects their physical wellness as they will barely move their muscles when operating cell phones.

Furthermore

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this

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statement is proven by research on how adolescents with low physical activity tend to be more brittle and easily get sick, even having a higher chance of obesity, compared to those who regularly walk or do exercise.

Consequently

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, the

juveniles

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' low physical strengths which are caused by smartphone usage will slowly disrupt their long-term health conditions, which is a higher risk of suffering chronic disease in the future.

Hence

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, too much screen time is not good for

children

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's bodies. In conclusion, the dramatic rise in offspring's cell phone usage happens because of the convenience of doing everything online.

Finally

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, the disadvantages that it may cause are the

juveniles

Use synonyms

' poor emotional regulations and the disruption of their physical well-being,

hence

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why I strongly agree that

this

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is a negative development.

pink pantherSun Jan 21 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure you have a clear central topic for each paragraph and use cohesive devices effectively to link your ideas. Avoid overly complex sentences that may confuse the reader.

task achievement

Fully address all parts of the task, ensuring that your position is relevant and clear throughout the essay. Expand your ideas with more focused and elaborate examples to support your argument more convincingly.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

325 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Your opinion

: In today’s world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages

Tell us what has inspired you to become a teacher and tell us why you think teaching is a good career choice for you.

You recently noticed a local restaurant that was offering a part time job. Write a letter to the restaurant manager. In you letter, Explain that you would like to apply for the job, give some details of any relevant experience that you have, specify the days and times that would suit you