You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a family for six months and look after their six-year-old child. Write a letter to the parents. In your letter explain why you would like the job give details of why you would be a suitable person to employ say how you would spend your free time while you are in Australia

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Dear Sir/Madam Hope you are doing great. I am writing with regard to the job opportunity for child care in an Australian magazine.I attached my resume to

this

Linking Words

email so you can see my experiences and education. I am a die-hard fan of kids and I enjoy spending my time with them. I believe that childcare is one of the best jobs in the world. As you can see in the attached resume I have a bachelor's degree in the field of child psychology and I have 3 years' experience in famous schools in Toronto as a teacher assistant.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, if you search my name on the GTA child care website you will find some reviews that my previous clients wrote for me which help you to make sure I can be the person that you are looking for. I am sure you would like to know how I spend my free time, I should say that whenever I get time I try to read books and watch comedy movies as they are a good source of entertainment and the best way to unwind. Please feel free to call me if you need more information or recommendations.I look forward to receiving your response. Yours faithfully, Marziyeh

ghazaleWed Jan 03 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that you structure your letter in clear paragraphs, each focused on a specific topic. The body of the letter should be divided into paragraphs: one for explaining your enthusiasm for the job, another detailing your suitability, and a final paragraph discussing your free time activities.

task achievement

You need to expand your explanation for wanting the job by providing more personalized reasons, showing a better understanding of the tasks involved in childcare. Detailing your personal motivation and connecting it to the specifics of the role offered, such as your approach to childcare and cultural exchange, can enhance the relevance of your application.

greeting and closing

The greeting is informal considering you are applying for a job and you do not know the family personally. A safer option would be 'Dear Parent(s)','Dear Host Family' or 'To Whom It May Concern'. The closing is appropriate in formality.

logical structure

While your coherence and cohesion are generally good, strive for seamless transitions between paragraphs for a more polished structure. The use of cohesive devices, such as reference words, conjunctions, and synonyms, should be employed to show clear relationships between ideas.

single idea per paragraph

It is not clear from your letter how you would spend your free time in Australia, as reading books and watching movies can be done anywhere. To improve task achievement, talk about activities you plan to do which are specific to Australia, such as exploring the local culture or engaging in outdoor activities unique to the location.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

Dear + name
Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

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2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

206 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Childcare, Nurturing, Patience, Creativity, Early childhood development
Babysitting, Au pair, Engaging, Responsible, Enthusiastic
Safety, Trustworthy, Adaptability, Proactive, Cultural exchange
Activities, Educational games, Language skills, Exploring
Volunteering, Community involvement, Australian culture
Flexibility, Personal traits, Schedule, Enrichment

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The Greeting

Some people think it is more important to spend money on roads and motorways than on public transport systems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The internet has revolutionized communication and access to information. However, some argue that its negative impacts such as isolation and the spread of misinformation, outweigh its benefits. Discuss both sides of this argument and give your own opinion.

All students should study a foreign language in school, starting in their earliest grades. To What extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

You have just finished a language course provided by your company and want an- other. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter you should say: - why you liked the course - why you need more - and say where and when the course should take place

Teenagers face a lot of difficulties at home and at school. What are the causes for this? How can parents provide solutions?